Page 54 of House of Blood and Roses: Vol. 2
"I think that makes sense," he says.
"Now I'm worrying about things that wouldn't have even entered my mind before. All I did was worry about the leaky roof and the food that was barely ever interesting, but was necessary to survive. And whether Bastian was going to get himself fired from his job again." Now I think about it, why did he have to get himself fired so often? We needed the money, surely he could have held his temper for a few hours to keep his jobs? I push the thought aside. It doesn't matter what used to be, all that matters is now.
"I'm sorry you had to go through all of that." Linc pulls me into his arms, wrapping them around me tightly and offering comfort I didn't even really realise I needed.
"What about all of the people who are still going through that?" I ask. "We're hardly going to be the only ones who have to live like that."
He nods and kisses the top of my head. "I know that you're worrying about that, but you can't take the weight of all the world's problems on your shoulders, Beatrice. At least not yet."
I laugh and nestle into him, enjoying the comfort of being in his arms. "I can try."
"You can. But you shouldn't. You're one person, and you've got a long life ahead of yourself. Maybe focus on the immediate problems we need to solve and then move on to the bigger things."
"You're very wise, did you know that?"
"Mmm, it's amazing what I can think of when my mind isn't clouded by wine."
I reach up and touch his cheek, wishing I wasn't wearing gloves even though it's far too cold for that. "How are you managing?"
"It's easier each day. At least at the moment. But I know that things are going well right now, and that makes it easy to think that I won't slip."
"You need to take the pressure off yourself when it comes to that," I respond. "You probably are going to slip at some point, but it's not the end of anything. All you have to do is try again the next day. Or the next drink. Whichever comes first."
He puts his hand over mine and smiles. "It's easier when I know that someone is counting on me not to reach for the wine."
"I'm glad I can help, truly."
Pip barks at us, and we both look over in her direction. She's a few feet away, wagging her tail.
"I think she wants to play," I say. "Another thing we didn't really have time for before we came here. I'd throw a stick for her sometimes, but I didn't get to take her on a proper walk every day that's just for her. She'd come with me and do errands. This is much better. For both of us."
"I'm glad," Linc says, leaning in and kissing my nose before letting go of me and taking my hand in his. Even through our gloves, I can feel the warmth of his touch. "We'll come play with you," he promises Pip.
She gives a happy bark and wags her tail faster.
"Why don't you find a stick?" he suggests.
It takes her a moment to realise what he's saying, but quickly bounces off in the direction of the trees. I worry for a moment that she's going to run deeper into the forest and we'll have to follow, but she returns moments later with a medium-sized stick in her mouth.
She doesn't even bother dropping it at my feet and heads straight for Linc.
"Well, I guess I know where I stand," I mutter.
Neither of them pays any attention to me as they start their game of fetch. My heart feels like it swells three sizes more by watching them. There's something wonderful about seeing Linc play with my dog. It reminds me that I have someone who sees me, even if we've still got a lot to learn about one another, I feel safe with Linc around. Like I matter. I don't know how I managed to find myself in this life, or what brought me to Linc, but I'm glad for it. And from the happy expression on her face, so is Pip.
EIGHT
The warm air makes my cheeks tingle now we're back inside, but it isn't entirely unpleasant. Pip doesn't seem to have any of the same thoughts as me and bounces along beside us.
"Is she ever out of energy?" Linc asks.
"No, I don't think so." I lean into him as we walk, enjoying his company, even if I know it has to come to an end when we get back to the House Rothorne apartments. It won't be long until I don't have to come back here at all, and I can spend my time in the royal living quarters with Linc.
It should scare me to think about how serious that is, but it doesn't. If anything, it just feels right.
We arrive at the door, and I push it open, setting off the bell that announces I've returned. Pip races ahead as far as her lead allows, barking happily as she sees Jemima approach.
My lady's maid dips into a curtsy. "My Lady, Your Highness," she says to each of us in turn.
