Page 76 of Duke
“I’ve noticed.”
I’m reaching up to turn off the second lamp on the other side of the bed when Wheeler says, “Stay.”
I go still. “Wheeler—”
“Will you just…lie with me?” She rolls over so that she’s on her side facing me. Her eyes are wide open now and clear. “Weird request, I get it. If I’m making you uncomfortable, just tell me to fuck off. But I don’t want to be alone right now.”
Aw, sweetheart, like I could ever tell you no.
“Sure,” I say huskily.
I don’t wanna be alone either. Maybe that’s part of the reason I wanna stay so bad. We got a lot to talk about. A lot to figure out.
I’m scared she’ll want to keep the baby.
I’m scared she won’t.
I need comfort as much as she does.
So I toe off my boots and take off my hat, running a hand through my hair as I put the hat on the bedside table. Then I climb on top of the covers and lie on my back. I cross my ankles and put my hands on my stomach.
“Comfy bed.”
“I love my bed.”
I turn my head a little on the pillow. “You feelin’ any better?”
“Much. That ice cream was life-giving.” She tucks a hand underneath her cheek. “What are you thinking?”
My heart gallops. “About the baby?”
“Yeah.” Her voice is soft.
I lift my fingers. “I…don’t know how to answer that.”
“Be honest. Please. Because I’ve had some time to think about it, and I still have no idea what to, er, think about it.”
For a split second, my mind races. Then it goes blank, save for a single thought. Well, two thoughts.
What advice would Mom and Dad give me?
Wheeler said they’d be proud of us. Of me.
What choice would make them proud?
“I don’t know,” I repeat. “This is complicated, Blue. I can’t quite wrap my head around it yet.”
I can’t quite figure out how to tell her how much I like her—how often I think about her—and that if we were five years older, with five years of travel and fun and freedom under our belts, I’d probably be asking her to marry me right now.
Wow.
Just…wow. No idea where that thought came from. But in my gut, I know it’s true. I’d take this pregnancy, unexpected as it is, as a sign from the universe that Wheeler and I were meant to be together.
I’d make having this baby and being together the right choice. I think itwouldbe the right choice. If, that is, Wheeler was willing to give me a chance. Which I don’t think she’d do.
I think she’d want love and friendship first.Thenmarriage,thenbaby.
Never mind the fact that we’re not five years older, and I haven’t seen or done nearly as much as I’d hoped to by this point.
