xxx
Your Favorite Fallen Angel
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Aries, sometimes we get out ahead of ourselves and make snap decisions in the heat of the moment that, upon further reflection, we regret. The good news, especially this month? We can affect re-dos. I want you to watch “Atlas Belched” (S. II, epi. 9). The subplot is about Maddie selling the agency to a more powerful rival. There are good reasons to do this, but it is a mistake—and she’s able to rectify it. Be Maddie this month, and rethink some of your impulsive choices that maybe aren’t working out as well as you’d like.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Taurus, you are the focus sign. The determined one. The plodder who’s always on the ground floor, keeping the trains running. This month, use this core characteristic of yours to get where you want to go. I want you to watch “And the Flesh Was Made Word” (S. IV, epi. 14). Maddie and David’s relationship is in turmoil by the end of the fourth season, but David knows what he wants. They resolve to schedule dinner, Lamaze class and a talk every Tuesday at nine p.m. (looooooove this breaking the wall again lololol). David is being like a Taurus here. Setting a focal point to make sure that a goal is achieved (sure, it doesn’t ultimately work out, but sometimes, all you can do is your best). This month, get things done by keeping your eye on that prize and taking concrete steps to achieve your goals!
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Your dual nature can be hard for even yourself to handle this month. The good news about your sign is that you are always able to see a situation from every side; the challenge is that you don’t always know where you stand. I think you should watch “The Color of Maddie” (S. IV, epi. 3). The subplot has to do with Maddie insisting she and David are just friends. David knows the truth, however, which is that they have always been, and will always be, so much more. Sometimes what we tell ourselves is the truth is just a ruse, Gemini. Listen to what you’re keeping buried or trying to convince yourself doesn’t exist.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Loneliness is something we all go through. It’s unavoidable. But sometimes, I think you, Cancer, struggle with this more than others because you can retreat into your shell and linger there when things aren’t going your way or when you feel overwhelmed. The key is to process those feelings, to think deeply and clearly, yet kindly, about yourself. I suggest you watch “The Next Murder You Hear” (S. I, epi. 4). Maddie goeshard into her own loneliness. It can be tough to go there, but that is where the growth is. What do they say, “strength only exists if it is tested,” right? Free yourself by processing your feelings and then get back out into the world, Cancer.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Leos are probably my favorite sign because you guys are so much fun to be around! It’s always a party with a Leo. The one thing that is not fun with you guys is giving you all criticism. You hate that—and this month, you really don’t like to be pushed. I think you need to watch “Maddie Hayes Got Married” (S. IV, epi. 12). Maddie’s gone off and gotten married on the fly. At first, David doesn’t believe it, but when he does, he makes it clear she needs to wear her ring and prove that things aren’t like old times for the two of them. Leo, you hate when someone fucks with your shit, but sometimes they’re right and you’re wrong. It can be hard to admit someone else might know a situation, or God forbid, you, better than you know (it) yourself. Don’t fight this month if someone gives you a critique. Just listen and take it in without getting defensive. You could learn something important for a future endeavor of yours or a serious relationship!
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Virgo, I love your precision. You are always determined to do everything properly and in an orderly fashion. This can get on people’s nerves, but that’s just because they lack your discipline. Own your wonderful control this month and spring clean the fuck out of your life (and I’m not just talking about your living space, but how about people or situations that don’t work for you, too?). Watch “Atomic Shakespeare” (S. III, epi. 7). A kid is not allowed to watchMoonlightingbecause he has to do his Shakespeare homework, so he imaginesTaming of the Shrewas an epi ofMoonlighting. The whole damn hour is in iambicpentameter! This is something only a Virgo would do—or could do.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
Speak your mind this month, Libra, to someone who counts! Partnership is very important to you, and part of that is telling the other person what you need from them. I know you’re not a big fan of confrontation or laying things on the line when it comes to yourself, but you have to ask for what you want this month! I want you to watch “Take a Left at the Altar” (S. IV epi. 3). Maddie is at her parents’ house in Chicago, and David misses her. He writes her a letter that concludes with him telling her that the separation is for crap and he wants her to come home. If David can do it, you can, too!
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
What I like about you, Scorpio, is that you tell it like it is. You’re not afraid of taking the heat for laying reality on the table and shining a bright light on it. You should watch “The Straight Poop” (S. III, epi. 9).Moonlightingwas a hot mess behind the scenes from the infighting among the actors and this whole hour is about David and Maddie’s relationship and why they don’t get along. I think it took courage to do this for the writers of the show, plus who doesn’t love a great wall break? Be this episode. Speak the truth this month as only you can!
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Sagittarius, you are the relentless optimist! No matter what happens, you are able to remain upbeat and sure that things will work out. It is in this vein that I urge you to watch “I Am Curious…Maddie” (S. III, epi. 14). The reason is not because it will teach you anything you don’t already know about the nature of destiny and the fact that things always work out as they should—because you already know this! It’s because this isone of the most famous episodes in American television, when Maddie and David finally get together (in a Biblical sense, but it’s so much more than that!). For all the people who doubted it could happen, for the ones who worried it wouldn’t, IT DOES! You, though, always knew things would work out for them, and everyone needs to take a page out of your book this month!
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Capricorns are the ladder climbers of the Zodiac, always looking for something better—and this is not a bad thing! Sometimes, though, it is important to take your foot off the gas and appreciate what you have. Watch “North by North DiPesto” (S. II, epi. 12). Agnes feels like she needs some sizzle in her boring life, so Maddie and David give her tickets to a fancy banquet. When she ends up being kidnapped and interrogated about an espionage operation, she escapes and finds the stolen plans. At the end of all her drama, she decides that she is happier than she thought with her “boring” life. The grass is not always greener where things glitter!
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
I worry about you all this month. You are always surrounded by people, but an island unto yourself—and this is a problem when you get hurt or disappointed (which can happen even to standoffish Aquarians). Watch “Blonde on Blonde” (S. III, epi. 11). Maddie is considering a one-night stand, and when she goes to a club, David follows her—and ends up tracking the wrong blonde. Classic identity confusion occurs, and he ends up in police custody…where he decides he loves Maddie. When he’s released, he goes to her house to tell her, only to have her door answered by another man. Aquarius, hurt happens, and when it does, we need our friends. Please reach out and share what’s bothering you with somebody this month. It will feel weird, butultimately, it will help you process your disappointment with someone or in something that is important to you.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
What I love about you, Pisces, is that your fluid nature and capacity for fantasy means that life can take you anywhere! Watch “Symphony in Knocked Flat” (S. III, epi. 3), and see David end up in a boxing match promoted by Don King! This is the month to follow your whims and explore everything that is open to you. New horizons await you, Pisces. Get ready for surprises and changes, all of which add up to exciting new opportunities!
May
OMG. Happy Mothers’ Day to all the moms out there! This kind of occasion is worth celebrating, and it got me thinking of the ways humans mark special days. Of course, Pandora! How did you know I was going there? Yes, it’s bracelet time, folks—see below for the charm that reflects the alignment of your stars for this month!
Love you!
xxx
