Blay:Thank you. *pushes Qhuinn away* Thank you, oh, God…
Rhage:*dumbfounded* *steps back from Xcor* Excuse me? For...????
Blay:*embraces Rhage* You are the best.
Rhage:*looks over at Qhuinn* *motions with hands, all WTF?* Um…I was just about to stab you right now? Do you want to be stabbed? Is there something you need to talk to Mary about, like are you suicidal or—
Blay:*closes eyes* For calling Lyric my daughter. For letting me be in on this like a true father.
Rhage:*one-brows it* What are you talking about? You are a real father? Just like me? I don’t get it. What am I missing?
Blay:*pulls back a little* *eyes gleam with tears* You and I are on different ends of this discussion, but I really…I was waiting for you to tell me my opinion doesn’t count because I’m just a stepparent.
Rhage:Oh, God no. *pshaws with dagger hand* Look, you’re wrong about the dating deal. And we’re going to fight a whole lot more about all this. But one thing I never doubt is that you’re her dad—just like Xcor is. Just like Qhuinn is. Birth is only part of it. I’ve learned that from adopting Bitty. The real nuts and bolts is more about showing up every night and loving them to the best of our abilities. The conception and birth in some ways is the easiest bit.
Blay:*rubs eyes* Thank you. It means so much to me. Thank you.
*big hug between them* *someone sniffles, but no one will admit who* *Qhuinn rubs his mate’s back*
Z:*from the couch* It’s all just a hypothetical anyway.
*everyone looks at Z*
Rhage:Why? *turns away and sniffles* *turns back around* Because we’re going to kill all males of dating age?
Xcor:That would require some effort, but I’m up for it.
Qhuinn:There are three of us, though. Share the load.
Xcor:We can do this—
Z:*shrugs* We’re pretending the worst is going to happen. That a mouth-breathing, knuckle dragger will show up on our daughter’s doorstep with a hard-on, a black book full of other females’ names and a switchblade hidden in their a** pocket. We’re getting aggressive now because we’re really just looking our own fears in the face, not meeting the eyes of an actual living, breathing male who truly does care about our daughters. It’s easy to pound the chest and be all thought-up in theory. But when they bring someone home, who knows…maybe we actually like the f*cking asshole.
*total shocked silence*
Rhage:*puts hands on hips* *clears his throat* Ah, listen, Z, if you’re going to continue to make sense like this, I’m going to have to stop hanging out with you.
Z:*getting to his feet* I’m never going to like it. But maybe I can learn to live with it if it makes Nalla happy. I think that’s Blay’s point. Or at least part of it. I don’t know. My head hurts.
Beth:*from the corner* You know, I wasn’t going to put my two cents in—except to keep you two from killing each other. But, just so you guys are aware, I plan on raising my son to be the kind of male I’d like to be with if I were a female of his age.
Rhage:So back before you met Wrath, you wanted to date a sociopath with a hair-trigger, the vocabulary of a New Yorker, and a voice that makes the testicles of grown males burrow intotheir pelvic girdle like they’ve been threatened with the business end of a cattle prod?
Beth:Well, when you put it like that—*shakes herself back to focus* I mean, I agree with what Z is saying. I just want L.W. to be the kind of male that parents would like. That’s all.
*another long silence*
Rhage:*curses* Guess we’ll all just have to muddle through.
Blay:Amen to that. At least we have each other.
Rhage:And tacos. Who’s in? *consensus is a hard yes* Let’s go eat.
(Edited to add: As the group left together, Rhage threw his arm around Blay, and Blay did the same. It’s a good reminder that even if you don’t agree, family still sticks—and chows down—together! But man, it’s going to be a long haul before this gets resolved, I’m telling you…)
Vishous’s Agony Aunt(s) Column
When I decided to go the newspaper route, I knew we had to do an Ann Landers-like column, and of course, V had to be the one answering the letters because he’d hate it and I love seeing him in situations that make him want to tear his hair out. But as soon as I started to work on the reply to the first inquiry, it was so snarky, I was like OMG, we need a balance to that hard-ass stuff! Mary is his perfect foil for this endeavor, and I really enjoyed seeing the two of them together, something that doesn’t happen in the books all that often.
