Page 108 of The Bodyguard Affair
My first instinct is to say, “Yes! Of course.” But I think about my conversation with Nolan. For the first time, I have the luxury of choice. The ability to ask myself whether this job is really something I want. And when I think about it, I’m not sure it is. I’m not sure I need the approval anymore.
“Gretchen, I don’t know what to say.”
“You’re going to say yes, aren’t you?”
“I—I was actually planning to write full-time,” I tell her. It feels oddly liberating to say that out loud, even though I’m fairly certain I’m about to break out into full-body hives.
She watches me with an expression I can’t decipher.
“I feel terrible leaving you, Gretchen. Especially now,” I add.
“No. It makes sense. You should move on. We both have to move on. And it would be selfish of me to take you when you’re capable of so much more.”
“Thank you,” I say, even though I don’t feel like I deserve it, coming from her. As I turn to leave, a mixture of relief and dread drops in my gut. At least now there’s some understanding, even if it doesn’t erase the complications or the hurt caused.
“You’re going to change the world with your words, Andi,” she tells me, her tone sincere before I cross the threshold. “You’ve already changed mine.”
I nod, feeling a lump in my throat. As I leave her office, the weight of the decision settles in my gut, but there’s something else there. A sense of possibility. Of excitement that I haven’t felt since I wrote that first line in my first book.
I already can’t wait to write the next chapter.
Chapter 49
Nolan
I make a drumroll with my free finger on the table as Andi finally signs her contract with her publisher.
It’s been two weeks since she handed in her official resignation to Gretchen. It was a tough decision to leave her, but the right one. But because Andi is Andi, she stayed with her through those first few weeks after the separation to help Gretchen organize her affairs.
It’s one of the reasons I love this woman so much. Her heart. The woman who comes with me to visit my mom nearly every single day and reminds me to bring her a bushel of daisies each time. The woman who supports my career, my long hours. The woman who’s always making sure I have everything I need before I realize I’m missing it. And I can’t believe she’s mine.
A small tear rolls down her cheek when she sets the pen down. I catch it with my thumb, wiping it away, along with allthe loose strands of hair in front of her face. “You really don’t have to film this,” she says, sniffling, taking a swipe at the camera.
I pull her into me, tracing the delicate line of her jaw, the full part of her bottom lip, partially tucked in. “Oh, but I do. This is a big fucking deal.”
“Thank you,” she says, her eyes glossy with emotion. “I don’t think I would have had the courage to do this without you.”
“You would have,” I say. “And I’m going to be here with you every step of the way, cheering you on. I’m proud of you, Andi. You deserve all of it.” And I mean that. Seeing her live out her dreams is surreal. Honestly, I just feel lucky to be here for the ride.
“So am I. Thank you for making me realize that—”
Something fuzzy yips at my feet, disgruntled by the lack of attention and belly rubs for the past five minutes.
“Just a minute, Cody,” I say, despite the way he’s wagging his tail and nudging my leg.
I adopted Cody. About a week after he was taken home by his new family, I got a call from Deidra. The adoptive family had brought him back. Apparently, Cody had been terrorized by their cat, who was on a mission to make his life miserable. Cody was so scared, he wouldn’t come out from under the bed. When Deidra told me, I didn’t hesitate. I hopped in the car and drove straight to the rescue farm.
Now, Cody is back with me…well, Andi and me. I’m crashing at her place temporarily until the yellow house closes next month. Andi started feeding him cheese like she did with Lars, and he’s never been happier. He’s curled up at my feet, looking up with those big, soulful eyes as if to say,More cheese, please.
Cody gives an approving yip and rolls onto his back, exposing his fluffy belly. His hair is starting to grow back, now that we’ve figured out the proper diet.
“Honestly, I think this is the happiest I’ve ever been,” she tells me once we giddily hit send on the contract.
Her words wash over me like the tiniest rays of sunshine. “It’s just the beginning.”
“Just the beginning,” she repeats.
She smiles, nuzzling her nose into the curve of my neck. I feel the warmth of her wide smile against my skin, and everything in me stabilizes. I’ve lived my entire life in motion, always coming and going—mostly going. Running. Never letting anyone get too close to me. Living in constant fear of being unworthy, of being left behind, forgotten. Of getting hurt.
