Page 55 of Mister Hockey
The banter and discussions faded as all gazes swung in her direction. She wiggled her toes in her wedge sandals. Center stage had never been a place where she felt confident.
“Um.” She cleared her throat. “We’re all gathered here today to celebrate the long life of an amazing woman—”
“It’s not my funeral yet, dear,” Granny piped up from the head of the table. “Remember I intend to live to one hundred and ten. That leaves me a good twenty more years.”
“No one in the room disbelieves you, Granny. And want to know why? Because you are like a fine wine.” Breezy lifted her glass in toast. “Getting better and better with age.”
“Damn straight.” Granny glugged the rest of her glass.
“But I want you to know that you have helped influence me. As a kid, heck, even as an adult, I wasn’t known for my self-confidence. But you have always encouraged me to live my best self. Be my best truth. That’s why I wanted to share exciting news. Many of you know that after an amazing run, I was let go from the library. It could have really been a kick in the gut. In fact, it was for a time. But then I remembered a line fromThe Sound of Music, a movie that I used to watch every Easter with Granny.”
“You know it! That Captain von Trapp makes my hills come alive.” Granny gave a shoulder shimmy while two of the uncles covered their ears.
“In the film, Maria learns that when a door closes, somewhere a window opens. Well, I wanted to share that I found my window.”
She reached into her purse and pulled out a manila folder. Her shoulders rose and fell with the deep breath. “Okay. Here goes nothing.” She removed the logo she’d gotten designed this morning and held it aloft.
“What is it?” Granny adjusted her spectacles, leaning forward.
“It looks like a bookstore.” Her mother peered with a slight frown. “You’re going to work at a shop?”
“I’m going to own the shop,” Breezy said, her voice quiet but unwavering. “Itsy Bitsy Children’s Books. I’m signing the lease. We’re just negotiating the contract with the bank.”
“Let me have a look.” Granny reached for the plans. She perused them for a long minute before giving a nod of approval. “This looks wonderful, Bumper Butt. Really good stuff. See, being a bookworm can be good business.”
It was clear she directed the pointed comment at Breezy’s mom, who didn’t respond, merely gathered dirty dishes the rest of the room was back to talking, laughing and drinking.
Breezy watched her mom walk out and despite everything, her Granny’s beaming face, her sister’s thumbs-up, it hurt with a calculated paper cut sting.
After ten minutes her mom hadn’t returned. Her empty space in the room loomed large.
She was too old to need her mother’s approval, but that didn’t mean she didn’t want it. Her whole life she’d felt like she let her mom down. Now, here she was, a small business owner. And still nothing? The disappointment in her belly filled with another emotion, anger. She wasn’t Neve, but come on.
She drained her wineglass and with a belly full of liquid courage, walked into the kitchen. She was a princess and this wasn’t her only dragon to slay today.
But Mom wasn’t there.
Breezy looked around. Did she ghost?
There was the sound of footsteps on the steps and door creaked open. Mom emerged holding a bouquet of yellow-and-pink flowers.
“Honey,” she said, breathless. “For you. I ran down to the corner flower shop in these shoes. I can’t believe I didn’t snap a heel. It’s like I always say, better to pay for quality.”
“You got these?” Breezy slowly reached out and took the bouquet. “Really?”
“I’m not good talking about my feelings. But I want you to know how proud I am of you. You did it. You really did it this time.”
Breezy stared, stunned. Had she choked on a piece of birthday cake because it sounded like Mom was expressing pride. In fact, she was tearing up despite the fact she wore mascara and expertly applied eyeliner.
“I know that there were times when I wanted you to be more like... me... rather than like you. After you lost your job, and right after you bought the house, I was worried. I’d even spoke to Jim about cashing in on a CD to help you with the mortgage. I was going to tell you today.”
“Thank you, Mom. Really. But that’s not going to be necessary. I’ve got a good loan, but the fact you wanted to help me means the world.”
“Itsy Bitsy Books. What a cute name.”
Breezy gave a small shy smile. “You used to sing me the “Itsy Bitsy Spider” when I was little, remember? And you’d always tickled me when singing the ‘down came the rain’ part.”
“To hear you laugh. You had those dimples. Oh, and that adorable laugh. This new step has taken courage and guts. I’ve been wrong to dismiss you. Wrong to think that you were settling. Granny won’t admit it now, but when I was younger, she thought my dream of figure skating was unrealistic. She advised me to go to secretarial school.”
