Page 103 of Undying
But apparently, my body and the darkness I carry within me disagree.
Something about the imposing jackass calls to me.
After so many years of living alone, he has become disillusioned and disengaged from the world. It’s like he’s been frozen in time, and he’s either forgotten what emotions feel like, or he doesn’t know how to deal with them anymore.
Perhaps a little of both.
While the guys might have a little sway over him, he keeps them at a distance as well. Or maybe it’s been so long that he’s forgotten how to let people into his life. He’s so self-contained that he hasn’t even realized what he’s missing.
Until now.
If I didn’t know better, I’d say there’s a yearning in his eyes when he looks at me. He doesn’t see me as a problem that needs to be solved anymore or a meal to consume.
It’s like he’s seeing the real me.
To my absolute shock, he seems intrigued by what he finds, admiration gleaming in his dark brown eyes. I almost shy away from the attention, feeling exposed, but part of me actually enjoys being seen for once.
“Exchanging blood doesn’t automatically mean becoming mates.” He flashes me a wry smile, and I battle against both relief and disappointment. “Mating is normally a complicated process, a union between two houses that takes months of negotiations.”
I glance at my mates from the corner of my eyes, wondering if we’re actually mated, and a hole opens in my gut at the possibility that they might not be mine. “I don’t understand.”
I barely resist reaching out to touch Castle at my side in a possessive gesture.
I don’t care what anyone says—they’re mine.
Stanton must see that I’m on edge, and he raises his hand to hold off my mounting anger. “You are mated to the boys.” The wolves snort, but Stanton continues like he doesn’t hear them. “No one can take that away from you. Most unions are sealed through sex. It used to be considered an honor to be chosen as a mate before females became nearly extinct. Over the years, the sacred ritual has become perverted. Women are sold and bullied into taking mates, even raped if they protest.”
I didn’t think I could get any more disgusted by vampires, but I was wrong. “And males don’t protest in hopes that they will eventually get their turn at claiming a mate. Because if a woman got a choice, she might not choose them.”
A muscle ticks in his jaw, his expression so dark that I brace for him to lunge across the table. He gives me a dangerous smile, his fangs flashing in warning. “Not on my watch.”
And I believe him.
Unfortunately, he can’t be in all places at once. “Is there any recourse for the woman after she’s been mated?”
The wolves growl in protest, but I don’t take my attention from Stanton. The information is too vital to be distracted.
Stanton’s eyes never leave mine. “Death is the only escape. The trouble is, when the connection snaps into place, it’s nearly impossible for a female to kill her mate. The essence of what makes you a vampire won’t allow you to kill your guardians and protectors, even if they’re abusing you.”
Death.
The one word reverberates in my head like a death knell, the thought of anything happening to my mates threatening to shatter my soul. The darkness inside me stirs, and I don’t doubt that if I lost them, my sanity would go with them.
At the mention of breaking the mating bonds, Castle slips his arm around me and pulls me close. When I don’t jerk away, needing the connection just as much, he breathes a sigh of relief.
Tobias looks like he wants to leap across the table to get to me, his blue eyes glowing. The need to soothe him is impossible to ignore, and I lift my foot and press it against his knee. He immediately captures my ankle in his hand, his grip inescapable, and I suspect I’m not going to get it back without a tussle.
When his thumb presses into the arch of my foot, I bite back a moan, completely happy to remain where I am forever. He smirks at my submission and relaxes back in his seat, then proceeds to use both of his hands to massage my foot, seemingly confident of his place as my mate now that he’s touching me.
I glance over at Milo, his absolute stillness so unnatural, it draws my attention. Doubts haunt his green eyes, making the vibrant green almost dim, and my heart clenches at his uncertainty. It’s like he’s terrified of drawing attention to himself, as if he believes choosing him has been a mistake, one he expects me to correct immediately by severing the connection between us.
Never!
I pull away from the wolves and stalk around the table, not stopping until I stand directly behind Milo. His shoulders slump, already accepting defeat, and it only pisses me off more. I reach forward and settle my hand around his neck, his pulse fluttering wildly under my palm.
He remains pliant in my hold, his throat moving under my palm as he swallows painfully. His acceptance enrages me more, and I force his head back until he’s looking up at me.
His breathing is rough, his eyes dilated, the lust in the green depths mixed with acceptance. “Trust can take a while to be earned. I chose you specifically as my mate. Why would you think I would change my mind now?”
