Page 87 of Fallen Thorns
“What was that about?” they asked, a tad out of breath.
“Oh, nothing.” I smiled.
My dead heart broke at their face.
* * *
Mars informedme during our brisk walk that Marianne had hoped to meet with me, alone, which they stressed profusely, to ‘discuss’ some things. They reassured me they hadn’t opened their mouth about what happened between me andMichael, but suggested maybe it was about how to deal with what Mars described as my ‘scary talent’.
So, she did tell them then. Of course she did.
“You know, then.” I wasn’t asking.
Mars nodded, their manner fading to seriousness.
“I swear I…” I began to defend myself, but Mars cut me off with a harsh shake of their head.
“No. No. Arlo don’t. Please.”
“What?” My chest grew tight, and my shirt suddenly lost its comfort. I couldn’t figure out if they were mad at me or pitied me, and the not-knowing made my hands twitch and flex into fists.
“I wasn’t there. I didn’t see what happened.”
“But Rani…”
“She’s perfectly fine; I spoke with her this morning.”
“You did?” I was relieved. “When can I speak with her?”
Mars shook their head again. “Arlo, you know what Marianne asked. Just leave it until tomorrow now, please.”
I knew they were right. I needed to spend some time apart from Rani and Carmen, just for the time being. For the good of everyone.
I swallowed the reality down hard, head nodding to the beat of realisation.
“I didn’t mean for it to happen.”
Mars didn’t respond in the way I hoped. They didn’t respond at all, just continued on the walk and changed the subject, pointing out the emptiness of the café we were headed to.
* * *
Mars was right,of course. Marianne greeted me outside my student accommodation at half-past five and explained she wanted to take me for a stroll. I obliged and followed her down the path.
“Are we finally talking again?” She initiated the conversation, though the comment struck me as odd in many ways.Shewas the one who was behaving differently around me. Or had I not even realised that it wasmewho was the problem. Was it me?
“I appreciate anything you say to me, so I would very much like to hope so.” It felt like a good response.
“You’re a shy young man, aren’t you?” she observed as I fell in line with her step.
“I suppose.” It was a remark I’d heard all my life. Nothing I did could change that, it seemed.
“You’re not comfortable with getting close to people either.”
Again, her deductions were correct, though the direction of this conversation remained a mystery. I waited for her to form her point.
“I fear I may have approached things…carelessly,” she continued, her tone warm and protective. “And that’s had quite the impact on you, detrimentally so, and I apologise for that.”
“You’ve been doing your best. I understand my head is a little complicated sometimes. Even I don’t understand myself half of the time, so really, it should be me who is apologising.” I threw her a compassionate grin, but she didn’t reciprocate.
