Page 24 of Drink Up, Darling
Godwin chuckled, his shoulders bouncing up and down. “I didn’t have the confidence then, I sure as hell do not have the confidence now. Please, take what you like, I insist.”
Athens looked defeated, slumping back into his chair.
“And you, Mr Hale, you have free rein of my clothing collection. I have no use for the majority of it anymore, you may find some antiques.” Godwin spoke as if they’d suddenly known each other for years. Like old friends catching up. It was comforting and helped to dissolve a lot of Dariel’s initial doubts and questions, but he could not fully let his guard down yet. The life of Godwin Peters was still a great mystery.
“I must say,” Athens finished his drink, wiping his mouth, “you are quite a gracious host. You’ve gone above and beyond this evening.”
Godwin blushed, his full cheeks beaming. “Oh, well. It is all or nothing with me when it comes to dinner, I’m afraid. I couldn’t expect you both to travel this far for mere mediocrity.” He set his knife and fork on either side of his plate. “Besides, you both turned out to be exactly who I hoped, and it has relieved me massively, I will admit. I can often be very reserved. More wine, Dariel?”
Dariel was stunned out of comfort, hiccupping. “Oh, sorry. Yes, please.” It was his turn to clear his throat now. As Godwin stepped towards him, heat returned to his belly, and the scent overwhelmed him. Godwin looked into his eyes and Dariel refused to look away, fixing his gaze upwards towards his host as he poured.
“You’re a bonny fellow, aren’t you,” Godwin said as he stepped away and wandered back to his seat, causing Dariel to take a sharp breath. He felt Athens’ gaze burn him from across the room, the attention of both men wholly on him.
“Oh, thank you.” He never got used to compliments, since they were often laced with judgement, no matter how kind they seemed.
“Easy to spot in a crowd,” Athens added.
Godwin must have seen the mild discomfort wash over Dariel’s face. His eyes drooped slightly. “I meant nothing but the utmost respect there, Mr Hale. I was drawn to your uniqueness. In fact, I quite envy you.” Their host reassured him. “There are many things I wish I’d been brave enough to do in my youth. I often wonder if I have perhaps wasted my life, looking back now.”
Dariel scrunched his nose. “What do you mean?”
Godwin sat back, shuffling on his seat like he’d already said too much. “Oh, well… You know. I’m not exactly, erm…”
His shyness was endearing to Dariel. He was a man of many secrets, but now, Dariel believed he’d be learning many of them very soon, one way or another.
‘I am growing to enjoy his company, aren’t you?’Dariel tried his hand at being the confident one this time. He watched Athens reach up to rub his top lip.
‘Not usually my type but he is growing on me. What about you?’
Dariel thought back to his past partners—both sexual and platonic. No one ever lasted that long. He spent most of his time on his own after all, but the time he spent in the beds of others were mostly happy memories. His escape from reality. When he could be himself. No strings attached.
He took a deep breath.‘He’s very much my type.’He was being honest.
‘Hmm. Interesting…’Athens didn’t look up.
Godwin could have changed the subject entirely if he’d wanted. The ball was in his court, but instead, in those few short minutes, he’d thrown away his mask and became his true self. “Gentlemen, I… may I ask something from you both?” He had finished his meal, napkin removed, and he tousled his grey-brown hair back. “It’s not quite what I ever thought I would ask—not how I pictured the evening going—but now that I’ve spent an hour or so with the pair of you, you’ve given me the confidence to open up a little. That’s if you don’t mind. I understand this was meant to be professional business and this will turn rather personal but I…”
“Go ahead,” Athens said with his hands under his chin.
“Yes… I don’t mind…” Dariel added much quieter.
Godwin breathed in deep through his nose and puffed out his chest. “Oh, grand. Okay. Well. Here goes. Now, stop me if this is too much but… How did you both, how would I put it, learn to love yourselves? Your life. Who you are?”
A dribble of wax spilled out from one of the candles onto the centre of the table.
Athens spoke first. “As in, our careers or…”
Godwin bit his lip before throwing both his hands over his mouth. “Oh, God. No. Never mind. Forget I said anything. More wine? How was the food? We can discuss business in my office if you’d prefer…”
“I had a wife once.” Dariel blurted out, eyes glued to the candle wax. No one spoke, but he knew they were both listening.
“Annette. We married young and bought a small cottage with money we’d both saved up, with some help from her parents. She was everything to me, and I meaneverything.”
‘Oh, Dariel, you don’t have to…’
Dariel filled his lungs, gaze still distant. “I loved her with every fibre of my being. With Annette, I was invincible. She never talked me down, never judged me, never forced me to do anything I didn’t want to, and I did the same for her. We went everywhere together—had our whole life planned out.”
‘The darkness, Dariel. I can see shadows.’
