Page 15 of Half-Hearted
That was day one… of six thousand, one hundred and fifty-three, according to my so-called friends who’d—
Present-day Joel stirred in his sleep, inhaling sharply as my fingers retraced the light stubble shadowing his jaw. I withdrew my hand and tucked it under my cheek, watching him slowly open his eyes while my heart twisted and knotted itself with excitement and nerves.
Six thousand, one hundred and fifty-three days and hestillmanaged to give me butterflies. I wondered if they’d ever go away.
“Good morning,” I murmured.
It took a minute for him to register my presence. First came the slow, sleepy blinks, then the confused frown, followed closely by an incredibly sexy (albeit reluctant) little smile.
“Morning,” he eventually grumbled. “You’re in so much trouble.”
Oh man, it was way too easy. “Great. Yes. Let’s talk punishments. Spanking? On the table. Naked spanking?Definitelyon the table. Or on your lap, whichever you—”
I snort-squealed when he pinched my hip, which made my stomach churn rather violently. It cut my laughter abruptly short.
“Absolutely no more of that,” Joel scolded, unable to keep the smile off his face no matter how hard he kept trying to push it down. “Do you have any idea what you put me through last night?”
Did he have any idea what he’d putmethrough over the last seventeenyears?
“Why don’t you tell me?” I suggested, trying my best to sound flirty. But the words came out a little gruff, scraping against my throat and… maybe it was best if I didn’t talk so much anymore. Or, like, at all, actually.
But then Joel sat up, shoving a rough hand through his dark hair. “Get up. I’m driving you home.”
“Wait, no, I—”
I sprung up way,waytoo quickly, and oh, it was such a big mistake. A horrible, terrible mistake that resulted in my brain slamming painfully against my skull, making everything spin.
Oh god, oh no.It felt like my brain and guts were tumbling inside a chaotically malfunctioning washing machine.
“… Lex?”
Nonononononono.
My palm slapped over my mouth, and I was running, sprinting to the bathroom. The door banged shut, and it might as well have slammed right into my head. I heaved my soul straight out of my body.
“Alexis?”
And then, to my absolute horror, the doorknob started twisting.
Oh my god. “Don’t!” I croaked desperately, fumbling with the lever on the side of the toilet with a shaky hand. “Joel, donot—”
I couldn’t get the full sentence out, but he thankfully listened anyway. The creak of the doorknob cut off, and for the next ten minutes, the only sounds echoing through the bathroom were of me regretting a whole bunch of my life choices.
When it eventually subsided, I pushed myself up onto unsteady legs and flushed one last time before walking over to the sink, where I made the unfortunate mistake of looking into the mirror. My face was every unattractive shade of blotchy red imaginable, my makeup was running, and my eyes were shockingly bloodshot. I looked horrible.
Perfect. This is… just perfect. Really well done, Alexis.
I blotted away the straying makeup and rinsed my mouth with toothpaste and water, my head still pounding. And then I lingered right there, leaning against the dark green wall, trying to figure out how the hell I was going to salvage this. Because I had to. Ihadto. I couldn’t let them be right.
Joel eventually knocked again. “Seriously, you alright?”
I cleared my throat, hoping it would make my voice come out slightly less goblin-esque. It did not. “I’m fine, just… I just need another minute, please.”
I rinsed my mouth again, and then a third time for good measure, trying to ignore how hard my head was hammering. Then I smoothed back my hair with trembling fingers, taking in deep, steadying breaths.
I was going to salvage this if it was the absolute last thing I did. I wasn’t leaving this apartment until this was… until I’d… until he’d…
My eyes prickled, and I tried to force the tears back, breathing, breathing, breathing.
