Page 61 of The Strawberry Field
Sawyer speaks first.“Do you think I’m crazy for making that promise to her?”
“No,” I say.“I understand how you feel. It tears me up to think about what she’s facing.”
“I can’t imagine her walking out of that hospital into a home full of strangers. But I don’t know how to stop that from happening.”
She goes quiet again, staring out the window. Then, almost to herself:“I wonder what it takes to become a foster parent?”
The question catches me off guard.
“I’m not sure,” I say carefully.“Are you thinking—?”
“I don’t know what I’m thinking,” she says quickly.“I probably sound like a complete basket case. One minute, I’m ready to walk away from everything. The next, talking about taking in a child.”
“You don’t sound like a basket case.”
She gives me a skeptical look.
“I’m serious,” I say.“You’re a compassionate person, Sawyer. You helped save that little girl’s life.”
She watches me, quiet again. I can see her weighing my words, trying to decide whether to believe me or herself.
“I know there are good foster families out there,” she says.
“There are,” I agree.“But that doesn’t mean you couldn’t be one of them.”
She shakes her head, turning back to the window.“It’s a crazy idea. I’m not in any place to be making decisions for someone else’s life.”
“You could be.”
She glances at me, surprised.“Jake—”
“Do you believe,” I ask gently,“that God puts people in certain places at the exact moment they’re meant to be there?”
She takes a breath.“Yes.I don’t think it’s a coincidence that we were the ones who came upon that accident. Maybe we were meant to help.”
“Then maybe there’s more to it than just that moment. Maybe there’s something you’re meant to consider.”
She doesn’t answer for a long beat. Then quietly,“I don’t know how I could. I don’t even know who I am right now.”
“Then maybe this is how you start to find out.”
She looks at me again, her expression uncertain but not closed.
“All I’m saying,” I add,“is there’s nothing wrong with looking into it. You’re not committing to anything. But if you do, if it’s something you want to explore, just know I’ll support you. In whatever way I can.”
And I mean it. I’ve never meant anything more in my life.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Sawyer
AFTER WE GET back from the hospital, I pace the house like it’s haunted. Maybe it is. Or maybe it’s just me, still full of ghosts I haven’t buried properly.
Michael. Tommy. My parents.
All the lives I couldn’t save.
And now… Hannah.
