Page 40 of The Love Audit
“Where is Derek?” I managed to ask, though I wasn’t sure I wanted the answer.
“Honey, that man has been wearing a hole in the floor the entire time we’ve been here,” Eleanor laughed. “And this one”—she gestured to Tora, curled up beside me like a furry guardian angel—“hasn’t left your side once. When Derek tried to shoo himaway, baby”—she nudged Dr. Lyons playfully—“I thought they were going to come to blows.”
My eyebrows shot up in surprise. Tora? Derek? At odds? The image of Derek having a standoff with a dog would’ve been hilarious if I weren’t so weak. I reached over to scratch behind Tora’s ears, my chest tightening with emotion.
“I think Tora knows we’re here to help,” Dr. Lyons said, her voice warm. “Animals have amazing instincts. You two must be really special to each other.”
Her words struck a chord, and my vision blurred with tears. I could only nod, my throat too tight to form words. Tora shifted slightly, nuzzling his head into my hand as if to agree.
“How do I take care of the bill?” I finally croaked, desperate to focus on something practical to distract myself from the emotional tidal wave threatening to overtake me.
“There’s no bill, sweetheart.” Eleanor patted my arm reassuringly. “Derek took care of everything. You just focus on getting better. I even made you some chicken and Pike berry soup.”
Eleanor’s words brought a wave of gratitude, but it was quickly followed by suspicion. “There are Pike berries in the soup?” I asked hesitantly, visions of questionable recipes like raisin-filled potato salad dancing through my head.
“Yes.” Eleanor chuckled. “It’s an old family recipe, and it works wonders. Trust me—it’s delicious. I wouldn’t serve you anything I wouldn’t eat myself.”
Her sincerity was enough to make me lift the spoon to my lips. One tentative sip turned into another, and before I knew it, the bowl was empty. The savory-sweet combination was unlikeanything I’d ever tasted, and I couldn’t tell if it was the soup itself or the fact that I hadn’t eaten in over a day, but it might have been the best meal of my life.
Eleanor took the tray from my lap, and Tora immediately rested his head in its place, earning himself another round of ear scratches.
“You must really love this dog.” Dr. Lyons glanced up from the tablet she was typing on. “To go searching for him all day in the rain like that?”
Her casual remark hit me like a freight train. Derek hadn’t told anyone that I was responsible for Tora going missing. My stomach churned with guilt and confusion. Why would he protect me like that after everything?
I looked past Eleanor and Dr. Lyons to the doorway, where Derek stood with David. His arms were crossed, his face a mixture of worry, guilt, and something softer that I couldn’t quite name. Our eyes met, and for a moment, the world seemed to still. I mouthed the wordsthank you,and he gave me a small, strained smile in return, the tension in his expression betraying the weight he was carrying.
As much as his actions left me reeling, one thing was clear: Derek Carter, the man I thought I’d figured out, was proving to be far more complicated than I’d ever imagined.
It was another hour before everyone left. By then I was feeling a lot better, but Dr. Lyons insisted on continuing to monitor my vitals just to be sure. Derek hadn’t stepped into the room while Eleanor and the doctor were there, insisting he didn’t want to get in the way. Instead, he managed to coax Tora outside for a walk.I wasn’t sure if he did it to create some distance between us or to ensure I wouldn’t be left alone. Either way, I couldn’t decide how I felt about it. If Derek’s reaction to me losing Tora was supposed to simplify my feelings for him, his response to my getting sick had done the opposite. I was back to square one.
Dr. Lyons and Eleanor left me with about a week’s worth of soup and Derek with a detailed list of care instructions. Despite my initial protests, I promised to spend the next two days resting, drinking fluids, and eating the soup—though I knew that last part wouldn’t be an issue. Alone in the quiet bedroom, Tora’s soft snoring at my side, I tried to listen to the hushed voices outside until I drifted off into a light, dreamless sleep.
When I opened my eyes again, Derek was sitting in the armchair across from my bed. He looked up when he noticed me staring and offered a small smile. I blinked, assuming I must still be dreaming. Derek Carter didn’t just sit quietly in my room, looking concerned. This had to be some fever-induced hallucination. I closed my eyes again, hoping the next time I opened them, reality would make more sense.
But the next time I peeked, Derek was still there. This time, he was scrolling on his phone. When he glanced up and caught me looking, he smiled again. That’s when I decided to speak.
“Do you plan on going to bed anytime soon,” I croaked, my voice hoarse from crying and disuse, “or do you intend to guard my bedside all night?” I twisted to sit up, rousing Tora in the process. “Because if you are, I think I’m already covered.” I patted my loyal companion’s head.
“I won’t argue with you there.” Derek chuckled, setting his phonedown on the nightstand. He poured a glass of water from the pitcher and handed it to me. “I don’t think I could do a better job than him, but I don’t mind. I’m not in a hurry to get back to the couch.”
“Tell me something.” I took a sip of water and placed the glass back on the table. Derek raised his eyebrows in curiosity. “How uncomfortable is that couch?”
“Extremely,” he replied, deadpan. Then a small smirk tugged at his lips. “Why do you ask?”
“Because I happen to be in possession of a king-size bed,” I began, trailing off at his quizzical expression. “And you might have saved my life, so I might be amenable to sharing it. If Tora’s okay with it.”
“That’s a very generous offer,” he said, leaning back in the chair and crossing one leg over the other. “But what if I don’t want to catch whatever it is that got you into this predicament?”
“I’m not contagious,” I shot back, narrowing my eyes, at least I didn’t think I was.
“You also haven’t showered or brushed your teeth in over twenty-four hours, so I’m not entirely sure which option would be worse.”
I sucked my teeth and rolled over, turning my back to him. “Fine,” I muttered. “Give your chiropractor my regards.”
Derek’s chuckle filled the room, followed by the creak of the armchair as he stood. “Jas,” he said softly, using my childhood nickname. The sound of it made me freeze. I turned to find him gazing down at me, his voice warm and teasing. “I’d be willing to consider your offer if you took a shower. You know you want to,” he added with a grin, extending a hand to help me up.
He wasn’t wrong. I was desperate for a shower. Now that the feverish haze was fading, I felt gross and sticky. I’d also been sweating into these sheets for over twenty-four hours. I couldn’t fathom how Derek hadn’t passed out while changing me into pajamas. Self-consciousness crept in as I hesitated, but his steady hand coaxed me to my feet.
