Page 69 of John Wilder Gets Schooled
“My goodness, you’ve grown!” Mrs. Freeman said, holding out her hand so we could shake. “It’s been a while, I guess.”
“Yeah,” I said warily.
“So, we have a situation,” she said. “As I’ve been telling Mr. Smith, it’s not an issue, but it is something we want you to be aware of.”
I looked over to Gracie again, sudden uncertain fear twisting my gut. Was there somethingwrong? Did she need to get tested for something? She was smart as hell but scatterbrained sometimes, but weren’t all five-year-olds like that? Or what if she’d been mean to the other kids? She liked to take charge. Had she crossed a line? I’d been worried she might get bullied at some point—what if shewasthe bully?
“Bye, Mr. Smith!” one of the kids yelled.
“Bye, Mia!” Avery called. “See you tomorrow!” And his smile faded again as soon as he turned back to us.
“Mr. Smith has had a complaint,” Mrs. Freeman said. “About you.”
“Me?” I asked. For a second I couldn’t hear anything over the loud buzzing in my head, and the sudden awful certainty that someone knew Avery and I had been hooking up.
“I put a picture of you in the class newsletter,” Avery said, “from the Adventurama.”
“Oh,” I said and then added dumbly, “I haven’t read it yet.”
“Well, someone did,” Mrs. Freeman said, “and shared it. This morning I had a complaint against Mr. Smith from John Wilder—PastorJohn Wilder—that you’re not a suitable person to be going on school field trips.”
I felt suddenly cold, as though I’d stepped off a ledge into a black lake in the middle of winter and sunk straight to the bottom.The pressure squeezed on my chest, and all I could do was give a jerky nod to show that I’d heard.
Mrs. Freeman looked around and lowered her voice so that little ears didn’t catch her words. “To put it bluntly, it’s bullshit. Our parent helpers are a valued resource, and I don’t take kindly to being told otherwise.”
I wondered what he’d put in the complaint. Probably the same sort of shit he’d said to me the night he kicked me out. That I was disobedient, evil, ungodly, and I’d be going to hell. I was pretty sure he hadn’t mellowed in the last few years. My dad wasn’t ever going to change.
“You can imagine my shock when Mrs. Freeman said the complaint was from John Wilder,” Avery said, his smile wavering. It was obvious he was still shaken up. Of course he was. He was a great teacher, and my dad had put in a complaint against him for daring to have anything to do with me. Avery cared so much for Gracie, and for all his students, and that asshole was trying to get him in trouble.
“I just wanted to make you aware,” Mrs. Freeman said, laying a hand on my forearm briefly. “In case there’s any issues further down the line. Or…” She hesitated. “Or in your personal life.”
“I don’t have any contact with my parents,” I said. I felt so brittle I was surprised I could speak without my voice shaking. I felt as though I wasn’t quite here, as though the roaring in my skull was wrapped around me like a hurricane, keeping me separate from this whole conversation. “Neither does Gracie. Av—Mr. Smith is a great teacher!”
It must have come out too loudly because Mrs. Freeman blinked rapidly. “That was never in question, Wilder.”
Good.
Good.
My dad hadn’t ruined things for Avery. Made them harder maybe, but not ruined them. Maybe he was losing his touch after all.
I couldn’t bear to look at Avery.
“Daddy?” Gracie tugged on my jeans. “I’ve got my backpack!”
Her little hand snaked into mine, and I held it tightly.
“Okay,” Mrs. Freeman said, smiling again. “We’ll let you go.”
“See you tomorrow, Mr. Smith!” Gracie said.
“Bye, Gracie!” He cleared his throat. “Bye, Wilder.”
I suddenly wanted to hear him call me Johnny, the way nobody else ever did. But he wouldn’t, after this. He already didn’t want to date me. After this, he probably wouldn’t want to cross the street to piss on me if I was on fire.
“Bye,” I said to the floor. And then, before I could think any better of it, I said, “It won’t happen again. None of it will happen again.”
And then I turned and hurried out of his bright, colorful classroom, dragging Gracie with me.
