Page 75 of Sweet Addiction
Because it’s gonna break.
One way or the other, everything does.
Dillan
“But it’s not him, right?” Lexie asks as she sips her cup of tea while we sit on the fluffy pink couch in the corner of Hopeless Romantics while Kaleigh mans the front desk. We’ve had a slow trickle of customers all day today. Enough to keep me occupied without losing my mind,even if I’m certain some people came in just to scope me out. There’ve been definite eyes on me throughout the day, and I caught one or two people trying to nonchalantly take pictures. I guess they thought I was either blind or oblivious because they were more than obvious about the whole thing.
“No, it’s not him. But it’s still...” I trail off, unsure what I’m trying to say, but Lexie seems to understand. At least she thinks she does. Though really, how can she when Rome and I aren’t together. We’re not like Lex and Lucky.
But if that’s true, why does this niggling feeling in my brain keep nudging me?
What if we were?
What if we could be?
What if I’d trusted Rome enough to ask him about that call two years ago?
Where would we be now?
“Have you ever been so mad at Lucky that you jumped to a conclusion and were wrong?” I finally ask because it’s not like I can tell her the truth. But I somehow need to talk to someone about this. “I think I messed up. And I think I’ve clung to that for so long, I’m not sure how to let it go.”
“Hmm...” She looks at me over the top of her pink cup. “I’m not sure it’s the same thing, but I think I know what you mean. And the best advice I can give you is decide if it’s worth it. Whatever you’re holding on to. Is it worth missing out on what could be if you do let go? I mean, you’re not giving me a whole lot to go on here, Dillan.”
“I know. I’m sorry,” I offer softly. “I’m just trying to work some things out.” I try to figure out a safe way to word any of it. “We sort of jumped over a few steps, and we still have a few things to work out. I guess this whole sex-tape thing brought up some old insecurities. I don’t know what I’m trying to say.”
“For what it’s worth, here’s my two cents as the woman married to the youngest Beneventi. They’re built differently. They love differently. Not saying you and Rome are in love, not that it’s even any of my business. But if you think he’s it. If you think he’s worth living with... spending your life with... don’t fight it. Fightforit. Those men are worth it. Don’t get me wrong, they’re all giant assholes. But not to us. Never to us. So figure out the steps you skipped and decide if you’re okay missing them or if you want to go back and walk them together.”
I wrap my arm around my cousin and lean my head against hers. We almost lost Lexie a few months ago, and I can’t imagine a world without her in it. “I love you, Lex.”
“Love you too, Dillan.”
“How long did it take you to speak Beneventi?” I ask, more than a little serious.
“I’m still working on it,” she admits with a laugh.
“That’s what I was afraid of.”
ROME
Are we acting like everything is normal or talking about the sex tape?
It’s. Not. Me.
No shit. Our tattoo artist is better than the AI shit on this dude.
—Text from Ryker to Rome
Sundays might be my sacred day, but one of the things I’ve learned since Dillan moved in with me is Mondays are her Sundays. She was up late again last night, locked in the office, working on whatever it is she’s doing but doesn’t want to talk about. At least not with me. But last night when she came to bed, sometime around three a.m., she didn’t put the useless pillows between us.
It was a small victory, but I’ll take it. A win’s a win.
An hour later, she’d tossed and turned her way right into my arms, and damn if that didn’t make it hard for me to get out of bed this morning. I skipped my run and stayed there, holding her as long as I could. Until I knew I was pushing it and had to shower so I wasn’t doing today’s press conference looking like the dog shit I already feel like.
Now, with gentle fingers I brush her hair from her face and drop a kiss to her temple, needing to get to the gym to handle this.
“Rome,” she murmurs. “What time is the press conference? I’ll come with you.”
“Not today,stellina. Sleep. I’ll be back later,” I whisper before quietly closing the door and heading for Crucible.
