Page 129 of Dance of Defiance
“That’s not what I mean. I just mean the general rivalry to get close with that Cosimo guy.”
“That Cosimo guycontrols the purse strings to one of the oldest, most powerful underworld institutions in history,” Vaughn says stiffly.
“No, I get that?—”
“So, what’s the question?”
“Is any of it about Dasha Lukashova? You were originally the one marrying?—”
Vaughn chuckles quietly. “Are you asking if I’m driven by some jilted lover bullshit?” He smiles. “No. I had about as much interest in marrying Dasha as I gather she had in marrying me. Did I want that connection to Cosimo Sangrini? Of course. But as far as I’m concerned, Roman Nikitin can have her.” His lips pull into a wry smile. “Though something tells me she’s not exactly histype…”
My jaw tightens. “Meaning?”
Vaughn shrugs. “Meaning Roman’s been keeping secrets from his father. One day, those secrets might be a way to?—”
“Don’t fucking do that.”
The words shoot from my mouth like a bullet.
“Don’t.” I shake my head. “Leverage is everything, especially in your world, I get that. But not this.”
Vaughn arches a brow as he glances at me. “So, you’ve seen it, too?”
“What I’ve seen, regardless of what Roman is or isn’t,” I growl, ”is the way the world looks through the pain and self-loathing of knowing you’redifferent.” I exhale slowly. “Remember when we had that talk? When we first reconnected, and I was trying to wrap my head around you being the head of a big shadowy criminal empire?”
He nods.
“What’d I ask you?”
Vaughn draws in a breath. “You asked me what my line was when it came to the Syndicate. What’s the one thing I wouldn’t do.”
“And what was your answer?” I press.
“Children. I told you I wouldn’t ever go after or harm children, even to get what I needed from their parents.”
“Exactly,” I say. “And thisthingyou might have on Roman?” I shake my head. “That's in the same category. You can’t use that against someone. It’s not a secret mistress or a gambling debt. It's part of their identity. You can't hold that hostage.”
Vaughn looks at me curiously. “Can’t I?”
“I won’t let you.”
His eye drag over my face, as if he’s trying to peer into my mind. When I give him nothing, he draws in a slow breath through his nose and finally nods.
“Fine,” he murmurs. “I won’t.”
“Thank you.”
“Can I ask why you’re so concerned with Roman Nikitin and his sense of identity?”
My face stays totally impassive as I shrug. “I’ve been there. I know what it feels like to hate yourself simply for what you are. It wouldn’t be leverage, Vaughn. It would be abject cruelty.”
He nods slowly. “All right.”
I finish my cigarette and toss it in the fire before standing. “I’ll let you get back to your sleepover.”
He smirks as he stands as well, dropping a hand on my shoulder. “I’m glad you came by. Truly.”
“Me too.”
