Page 4 of You Chive Me Crazy
Peace. Serenity. Love. Peace. Serenity. Love.
“Oktoberfest is one of the most celebrated festivals in the world,” I said. “Millions of people attend, including press from around the globe.”
“And that’s whyweneed to be somewhere else!” he said. “You’re riding a wave of popularity right now, but if you keep doing what everyone else is doing, you’ll just be another average Joe, or even worse, you’ll become stale. The time is ripe for pivoting. We’reDevour America, notDevour Germany, therefore it makes little sense to be there. Besides, Oktoberfest is all about the beer, not food. People drinking and singing ridiculous songs nobody knows the words to. Who wants that?”
Me. I want that.
Oktoberfest had been on my bucket list for as long as I could remember. I had planned to enjoy the festival, tour the amazing castles Germany was known for, and eat the best bratwurst on the planet. The trip had been booked for over six months, and it was practically all I could think about.
I continued to plead my case as my pulse throbbed in my temples and my neck heated up. “What about the flights? The tickets are nonrefundable.”
“Perfect,” he said without blinking an eye. “We’ll write it off as a loss on our taxes.” He held up a finger. “Oh, and write reviews on your top three favorite food trucks. No negative reviews.”
That was not an appetizing request since it meant I would have to keep eating and eating and eating until I found three that I liked.
“How many food trucks are there?” I asked.
“Over a hundred,” the Dickster said.
I choked on my saliva. “Seriously?” The thought of being forced to taste that many unpalatable meals was already making me nauseated. I’d have to load up on Extra-Strength Tums and Nexium if I were to have a chance of making it to the end.
“It’s the biggest food truck festival in the US, so what did you expect? It’s the epitome of Americana, and you get the privilege of being there todevourit! Now you can see why you have to be there.”
Nope. I still didn’t see any legitimate reason.
“Don’t forget this,” the Dickster added. “Your accommodations for the next seven nights.” He slid an envelope across his desk.
I blew out a frustrated breath, grabbed the envelope, and jerked my head back when I saw what was printed on the outside.
The Serendipity Inn.
The Dickster gestured at the envelope. “Lucky for us, you got the last room in the entire town. Is that serendipity or what?”
Rolando would have a field day with this one, but I didn’t want to hear one word from his mouth about fate or destiny or whatever. As for my boss, he was utterly clueless to presume I’d consider this in any way a comparable trip to what he was making me give up. The man was delusional.
“Okay—I need to schedule another meeting, so I can tell everyone we’re going to increase the weekly meetings.” The Dickster flicked his hand toward the door to signal it was time for me to leave. “Keep me posted while you’re there. I’m so excited about this.”
“That makes one of us,” I mumbled under my breath as I turned to leave.
I dragged myself down the hallway toward Rolando’s office to share the news with him.
“Uh-oh,” he said after I peeked my head inside his office. “I don’t like that look on your face. Did the Dickster fire you?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes for a moment. “No, it’s much worse than that. I have to review a food truck festival.”
Rolando laughed. “Oh, come on. It can’t be that bad. I’ve sampled more than a few gourmet food trucks withamazingfood. Which festival?”
“Big Bang Big Bear.”
“Wait—isn’t that this weekend?”
I nodded.
“Oh—I get it now. Germany is out . . .”
I nodded. “But it gets worse.” I handed him the Serendipity Inn envelope and waited for him to tell me how fate was involved in this.
Any second now . . .
