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And at that moment, I know—I will win the race.
Because I don’t race against my heart anymore. I race with it. Before, when the races were over, I was alone. Alone with my thoughts, alone with my dark soul. There was only one formula. A game. A haunt. Flirting. Fucking. Controlling. And repeat. But now there is her. I have something to go home to, to fight for. I will not live in the past, but in the future.
I’ll race toward the woman Ilove.
I hug Monica tight when I witness Aaron’s victory for the first race of the season. I feel like everything is finally falling into place for us. I’m fearing only one thing. The distance between us. Aaron will be busy with racing, and I’ll be on the other side of the globe. He asked me to come to Australia with him, but it would just be a one-time thing, right? Is that so bad I want to travel the world with him? The other drivers don’t have their women cheering for them at each race. And Wolf is the alpha type. The type who needs his freedom. Can I really trust him? Can I stay apart from him for so long? The thought of an empty bed at night is something that turns my stomach. I got addicted to him so fast.
“Well, love looks good on Aaron’s face.” Monica smiles as she sees Aaron jumping into his teams’ arms.
“What about you?” I arch my eyebrow into the direction of Louis who trots toward his pit before shaking hands with Aaron, congratulating him on his victory.
“He’s gonna work hard for it.” By watching Monica’s expression, I can sense she will make him wait for months. “I’m pretty sure he won’t give up, though. Seeing Aaron happy in a relationship has made him want to be a better man.” She chuckles. “I surely won’t be a better woman.”
“You’re an amazing person, Monica.” I roll my eyes. “Sometimes you’re just like Aaron.” Both of them are teasing, seductive, and don’t allow themselves to love.
“Just like me, hmm?” I feel Aaron’s arms grabbing my waist from behind.
“And that’s my cue to go.” Monica waves at us.
I turn around, pulling my arms to his shoulders, biting my lower lip. “Great race, Wolf. Tonight is worth celebrating…”
His eyes grow with lust, sparkling as he starts to groan. He moves his gaze to the deep plunging neckline of my flower print summer dress. “You’re not wearing any bra?” I shake a no with my head, cocking my eyebrow playfully. “You’ll be the death of me, Elle.”
“Don’t you like that I’m a step closer to get naked soon?”
“God, Elle, I love you,” he says instantly, and I open my eyes in shock. He loves me?
As I notice Aaron’s eyes wilder, I realize he didn’t mean to let it slide. Or maybe to say it at all? He probably meant he loves that I’m a step closer to get naked, right? Not love me? My heart is hammering.
But our moment has to wait as Thomas calls Aaron out on the podium to celebrate his victory.
I can’t stop thinking about Aaron’s words. Should I confront him? Being in the incertitude is making me anxious. I should forget it. It’s nothing, right? Aaron comes back to me once he finished handling a press conference. Tonight, he says he wants to invite me to one of his favorite restaurants. Maybe he’ll tell me there?
He kisses me softly when his phone interrupts us. “Damn it, this is the fourth time. I’m sorry, Elle.”
He picks up and his whole expression changes. For a couple minutes, he remains silent, his face completely closed off. “Okay.” A beat. “I don’t know.” A beat. “I’ll keep you informed.” He hangs up.
“What is it?” I start to worry, my fingers caressing his arm.
“The hospital. André is dying.” He pauses. “He won’t make it through the week.”
Like father like son
My bastard of a father is dying. I shouldn’t care. Hell, I shouldn’t even be here. He is cruel, and he deserves to die alone. But Elle convinced me to fly to France to meet him. She said it would give me the closure I need. To know why he hated his own blood. To know why he couldn’t be my father. One thing is sure, if he’s hoping for forgiveness, he can still hope. I will never give him this satisfaction. But Elle is right. I should watch him agonize. I should see him going into ashes and laugh at his death. I should be the last person he sees when he quits this world. He’ll know how much I despise him, and how much I’ll never forgive him. Redemption is not something I will offer him.
It’s my revenge.
“Are you gonna be okay?” Elle asks, intertwining her fingers with mine as we stand in the middle of the hospital hallway.I have been wanting him dead all my life, of course, I’m okay.“I’m here if you need me.”
I stare at her; she’s pure kindness. I had planned the perfect romantic night for us. I promised her an exotic vacation, and instead, I dragged her into a freaking hospital, made her fly for twenty hours. “I’ll be fine. I won’t be long.” I kiss her forehead before walking through the white corridor to his room.
Revenge. It’s all I have in my mind. Hospitals give me goose bumps. I hate these places. People die. People are sick. They are dependent, and being caged in your own body is the worst human curse. I’ve never been afraid to die, but being here sends a chill in my spin. I’m facing his room number and hesitate to enter for a fraction of a second. Finally, I open the door, ready to glare at his face.
But when I witness André’s mouth hanging open, his eyes stuck on the wall, his face white as a ghost, I don’t smile. André, usually so powerful and scary, is now lying in his bed, incapable of getting out of it, with a feeding tube in his stomach. Peeing in his own clothes. Needing someone to wipe his ass.
Dependent.
Vulnerable.
