Page 42 of Unbreakable
The thought came out of nowhere, but I knew it was true. Dylan wasn’t getting it. I was trying to show him what I needed, but until I was gone, the message wouldn’t be received.
The thought of leaving turned me on. Dylan groveling after me. Dylan cleaning up his act. Dylanhearingme. Dylan begging for me back.
I rolled my hips to put my ass against his erection to his delighted groan. Tonight, I would give him my body. I’d make it so good, going all in. Blow him. Ride him reverse cowgirl so he could stare at my ass. Make my ass and tits bounce. Cup his balls when he came.
Tonight, I’d give him something to miss. Something to make him feel sorry. Something to show him that I’m not selfish. Something that wouldn’t let him take me for granted again.
And tomorrow, I’d make my plans to go.
EIGHTEEN
DYLAN
THEN
Jeanine wasn’t waitingfor me after my game. I thought for sure she’d come to it, though I never was able to spot her in the crowd. I shot her a text, making sure she wasn’t in the bathroom or something.
U here or u go 2 bed?
Jeannie
I’m home
U ok?
She didn’t respond. Something was off. I got scared. I said a quick bye to Chappy and speedwalked to the parking garage.
I called Jeannie from the car and she didn’t answer. Shit shit shit shit.
It was a few weeks after the miscarriage. Jeannie was seeing friends and getting out. She went back to her dance class, one of which she came home from crying. Like, bawling hysterically. I couldn’t do anything but hold her. She said she couldn’t talk about it.
I got it out of her a little later. She wouldn’t say it directly, probably trying to spare my feelings. But what she said made sense: she didn’t just lose the baby. She gave up a great theater role for the baby and me. And she didn’t feel the same going back as she did before we got married.
My worst fears were coming true. Was she done with me? Or my very worst fear: had she hurt herself? I had these flash panics where I’d be the one to find her, and it’d be too late.
The night before this game, I’d broken the news about the miscarriage to my parents. Dad responded in an appropriate way, with agosh, I’m sorry, kiddo. How’s little Jeannie?Ma, however, thought this was excellent news and meant I could leave my, and this is a direct quote, “slutty Hooters waitress girlfriend and get the marriage annulled.” She also added that the loss must be something from Jeanine’s side of the family because she had a healthy pregnancy with me.
Needless to say, I was horrified, appalled, and absolutely heartbroken that she’d talk about Jeannie like that.
Luckily, Jeannie was in our bedroom asleep, saying she didn’t really feel like telling anyone else. The thought that she could have overheard what Ma said was nauseating.
It rattled me. How could my mom say that about Jeanine? About the child we wanted so badly but lost?
And what if Jeannie heard her?
Mom went on. Now the wedding made sense, because it was just a shotgun wedding. That was part of the reason we didn’t tell anyone she was pregnant. I really did want to marry her that soon, regardless of whether we were having a baby. I didn’t want people making assumptions about the nature of our relationship.
Jeannie’s mom had quoted some famous movie and said, “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life withsomebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”
That phrase perfectly captured how I felt. Jeannie was the end game. Why not start right away?
All those thoughts swam through my mind as I raced home to J. When I got home, I called out for her, throwing my suit jacket over the back of the couch and checking every room until I found her with an open suitcase on our bed. Her back was to me, meticulously folding a t-shirt and putting it in the bag.
“Jeannie?”
She peeked over her shoulder and gave me a weak smile.
“Where are you going?”
