Page 24 of Mr. Winter
“Start with the biggest.”
I sigh hard and look at him. “You know my biggest issue. We were almost a couple.”
“Were a couple,” he corrects me. “I fully considered you my girlfriend.”
Ugh, that makes it worse.“Then why, Jack? Why leave without saying anything?”
“I left you a note.”
I rub my face with irritation. “One, that’s not the same. Two, a couple of words on a page is not goodbye or an explanation. ‘I’m sorry’ doesn’t mean shit.”
“I understand.”
“Do you? It would be easier if I knew something at least. We were teenagers. We’d have to move on, but you left me stuck wondering what the hell happened and hoping if you were okay. You’ve been back here a whole damn year, and we didn’t know!” I stop talking because I’m becoming upset enough to yell or cuss at him again. After a breath, I continue. “Then when I reached out—not knowing who you were—you were rude and cold like I did something to you.”
“What do you think about that?”
“That you don’t care about me, and our time together wasn’t as significant as I thought.”
He takes another sip of his drink and puts it down. His face is unreadable, and I’m not sure if what I’ve said had any impact. It would be sad to find out he doesn’t care and damn embarrassing since I’m stuck with him until the snow melts. Maybe I’d volunteer to be put back in the loop.
“And how does that make you feel?”
His blue eyes are back on me, giving me his full attention, but something in them tugs at me and speaks to the emotion I’ve been suppressing since running into him. My gaze drops to his lips, but he cups my face to force me to look at him. The tears I’ve avoided cloud my eyes.
“You hurt me. Do you understand that?”
My head drops as tears spill. The old hurt and confusion merge with the realization that Jack has been under my nose for a year and didn’t bother to say anything. The anger is gone because the hurt dominates. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me into the warmth of his chest. Jack kisses my temple and rubs my back as I cry.
He starts humming “The Christmas Song” I can’t help but scoff since he’s featured in the song. His chuckle vibrates against my cheek, but he sobers quickly.
“It was never my intention to hurt you, Arden. There is much more about my life than what meets the eye. Being Jack Frost has major responsibilities I wasn’t ready to take on. I left the legacy with my grandfather. I just wanted a normal life. I couldn’t do that and be Jack. I couldn’t be here and not be Jack. I had to walk away. But when he passed…”
“You had to take over. So, Old Man Winters had this power as well?”
“Yes. I was here so much so he could teach me how to command my magic.”
“Why didn’t you tell us you were here?”
“I had a lot to learn and relearn. Like I said, there’s a lot. I didn’t want any of you, especially you, to suffer if I fuck up.” He tucks his finger under my chin to make me look at him again. “I loved you. It wasn’t fair to tell you before leaving. It hurt like hell to walk away, but it’s what I needed to do at the time.”
His confession makes my chest hurt.Jack loved me. I remind myself that it’s past tense. We don’t know the adult versions of each other.
“But what happens now?” I ask instead.
The flash of regret in his eyes isn’t a good sign. “I have no fucking idea. The only thing I can guarantee is that we’re here now.”
Chapter 12
Espen
I was never a fan of Arden’s tears especially if I am the cause of them. I know things were left incomplete, but I didn’t realize until recently that she’d still be so affected by it, which doesn’t make sense since I am still holding on to what we had. Still, that part of our life needs to be put to rest since we aren’t those optimistic teens anymore. We’re both adults with our own mindsets, and that’s what we’ll need to navigate.
She’s lying on my chest while I hold her in silence. It’s true that I have no idea where this can go. My fear for her safety is still present and spectacular sex is not going to erase that fear. Also, since I’ve had her, I don’t know if I can fall back into the way I was before she broke in and confronted me. We’re at an impasse.
Arden sits up and looks at me as if I have an answer I didn’t have a few minutes prior. I wish I did. I opt to go with what I know.
“Like I said, I have no idea what our future holds, but we can focus on now. Jack is associated with fun, hope, and mischief, but there are much heavier things on my plate. When I was here as Jack, that’s who I was. Fun. Which is why I came back as my birth name. Espen is allowed to be serious. No one expects me to be fun. But this week, for you, I can be that Jack again. We can have fun and not worry about the future if that’s what you want.”
