Page 96 of Headcase
“We were having a moment,” Asa said, defensive.
Noah chuckled, taking a wet wipe to Zane’s face. “Yeah, well, your dad’s pissed. He was afraid you blew this off and eloped to Mexico or something.”
“We were just getting a jumpstart on the honeymoon,” Asa said with a shrug. “I didn’t think a blowjob was going to be such a huge ordeal.”
Adam shrugged. “Apparently, it is when there’s a guest list of five hundred people and an ice sculpture melting in the reception hall.”
Cricket breezed in, a baby on each hip. “There you are. Can we get this going? These two have to go down for their nap in thirty minutes, and if you think Beverly threw a fit, wait until you see these two meltdown.”
Zane went rigid at the mention of his mother’s name. “What about my mother?”
Cricket gave August and Lucas a bug-eyed look. “You didn’t tell them?”
Noah’s hands waved wildly. “Haven’t exactly had time. Can’t exactly have Zane showing up at the altar looking like the fluffer on a porn set. Yell at them.”
“What about my mother?” Zane asked, allowing Noah to poke and prod at him in an attempt to make his clothes look less wrinkled.
Avi did the same to Asa, but mostly because he’d made the suits and wanted them to look perfect for the paparazzi.
“She tried to crash the event,” Cricket said, shifting the babies.
Asa had no idea how she managed to look effortless while holding onto two squirming infants and wearing four inch stilettos, but she did. He stepped away from Avi, knocking Noah’s hands out of the way to cup Zane’s face as he began to hyperventilate. “Babe, we knew this was coming. You said so yourself. It’s fine. This is fine. Cricket saidtriedto crash. Tried. Right?”
He looked to the others for confirmation. They all nodded.
“They dragged her out of there like she was Archer after a bender at the strip club,” Jericho promised.
“It’s true,” Archer said from where he lounged in the corner, flask in hand.
“I told you she would ruin this for me,” Zane whined, his voice taking on a slight edge of hysteria.
“No, she tried. But she failed. She will always fail. We’ve got your back. That’s what family is for,” Noah promised.
“I thought it was for a good cover story?” Zane said, a little bit of humor returning to his voice.
“That, too,” Asa said.
“Anything good in my life, she tries to take,” Zane muttered.
“And fails. She will always fail,” Asa reiterated. He’d say it as many times as Zane needed to hear it.
Zane was right, though. Since Asa and Zane had gone public with their relationship, and then engagement, Beverly had done everything in her power to wedge herself into the family. Zane had almost given in to her guilt trips a dozen times, but Asa made sure he was the line Beverly had to cross to get to Zane and Asa would not budge.
Zane was finally happy. The handlers they’d found in Freddie’s files were being dispatched slowly but surely. He and Asa were the definition of a power couple, like Asa had said. When Zane revealed evidence that Freddie Deetz had created a game that had cost dozens of people their lives—including his own brother’s—his stock immediately rose. Within hours, he was juggling job offers from hundreds of papers and magazines.
When Freddie’s body eventually washed up on the shore, with evidence showing he’d been murdered, Zane took to his brand new YouTube channel to postulate about a possible vigilante taking revenge on the cruel and heartless monster, rocketing his views to a level that made him worthy of panels at Crime-Con and got him guest spots on a dozen talk shows.
Bev tried to make herself a part of it all. She tried to leverage Zane’s guilt over Gage. She tried to get interviews. She even floated around a tell-all book where she vowed to tell all of Zane’s secrets. As if Zane had secrets. Zane was perfect. Above reproach. His background was choirboy clean. Every single time Beverly tried to steal Zane’s spotlight, Asa made sure the full weight of the Mulvaney name crushed whatever deal was in the works. But, somehow, she always broke Zane’s heart.
“Guys, we really gotta go,” Cricket said, nodding towards the doorway. “Money only buys so much grace with the Episcopalians.”
“Okay, okay,” Asa said, holding his hand out to Zane. “You ready, Lois?”
“Let’s do this.” Zane nodded, screwing a nervous smile onto his face.
Asa practically dragged Zane through the double doors at the back of the church, then up the aisle where more than a hundred people watched and whispered. When they reached the front, Asa gave the priest a smile. “Sorry, there was a…fire.”
“Awhat?” the priest asked, horrified.
