Page 151 of Crank (Crank 1)

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And it occurred to me for one uneasy moment

that every move I had made lately might have

started a landslide.

What if I couldn’t go back? What if I died in the crash?

Almost immediately, the monster soothed

me, confused me with a deeper question.

What if the ride was worth it?

I mean, who wants to trudge through life, doing

everything just right? Taking no chances means

wasting your dreams.

How can I explain the pure chilling rush of

waiting to do something so basically not right?

No fear. No guilt.

How can I explain purposely setting foot on

a path so blatantly treacherous? Was the

fun in the fall?

I Hoped Not

As I softly opened my second-floor window,

peered down at the cement walk below, took a deep breath.

Fingers clutching the upper sill, toes stretching

for the first-floor trim, I managed to touch down

safely. It may have been the safest moment

of the night, in fact. Gulped into darkness,

I let my eyes adjust, felt the breeze lift

goosebumps, listened for signs of household disturbance.

No motion. No sudden snitch of a light switch.

No sound but distant coyote song, I silenced

my conscience, quieted my screaming nerves

and slipped away unnoticed, for the moment.

No streetlights, no headlights, the world

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