Page 25 of Bursting With Love
“Exactly what are you saying?” she asked.
“This is really hard for me.” He let go of her arm and ran his hand through his hair. “For two years, I never looked at another woman. Then you burst into my life all bossy and confrontational, and not only can I not take my eyes off of you but I can’t stop thinking about you. It took all of my willpower not to crawl into your tent this morning. And when you came out of your tent to join the others, looking so beautiful with that smile that gets to me a little more every time I see it, I had to suppress the urge to take you in my arms and kiss you until neither of us wanted to do anything but sneak off into the woods.” He looked away. “This is crazy. I sound crazy, and I know that.”
When he turned back to her, his eyes searched hers, and she knew she should respond with something, anything that would make him feel less nervous, but she couldn’t find her voice. She was still stuck on I can’t stop thinking about you.
“Look,” he began. “I was with one woman for ten years. I barely remember anything, much less anyone, before she came into my life. Then I lost her, and my world ended. It stopped, Savannah. Do you know what that’s like?”
She shook her head.
“And then I’m finally able to function like a normal human being. I can teach people basic survival skills, fly my plane, go into town…” He began pacing. “Okay, maybe it’s not normal, normal, but it’s functioning all the same. Crazy, right? That I’d let my life stop like I did?” Jack stopped pacing and crossed his arms, then uncrossed them and continued. “Anyway, now…I’m kind of lost again.”
“Because of me?” She couldn’t really follow what he was saying. Was he unhappy about what happened between them or was he glad it had happened?
He stepped forward and folded her in his arms. “Jesus, Savannah. Even this.” He took a step back. “Touching you in this innocent way sends my body into overdrive. Look.”
Savannah lowered her eyes to the impressive bulge in his jeans and raised her eyebrows. I guess that’s my answer. She looked up at him and grinned.
“Great. It’s really funny,” he snapped.
He ran his hand through his hair again, and Savannah warmed at the nervous habit.
“I have to go lead those people out into a dangerous forest, and while I should be thinking about shelter construction, rolling hitches, and sheepshanks, I’m thinking about your naked body pressed against mine. I can’t even go down to the stream without getting a hard-on.”
Savannah laughed. She knew exactly what he was feeling, because she was feeling it too. Just looking at him made her get all quivery inside.
“Great.” He shook his head. “You go ahead and laugh, but it’s not that easy to hide it, you know? Not to mention that I want to kiss you so badly right now that I could come in my pants just thinking about it.”
She used his bulging forearms for balance and lifted up on her toes, kissing him lightly on the lips. He grabbed her arms and deepened the kiss. When they drew apart, she asked, “Will that hold you over?”
“No. It won’t hold me over. Now I’ll be like this all day.”
She loved the way the muscles in his arms twitched when he was nervous, and the way he held her possessively, as if he couldn’t stand the idea of her walking away.
“Well, I can’t exactly help you with that now, can I?” she teased.
Jack began pacing again.
“Why are you so twitchy?” she asked.
“I’m not twitchy,” he barked.
“Horny?” she teased.
He stopped pacing and stared at her.
“I guess two years is a really long time,” she said.
“I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t know what I want. No. I do know what I want, but…” He lifted his eyebrows flirtatiously.
“Stop.” She laughed. Inside she was jumping up and down, silently cheering, Yes! God, yes! She glanced back at the camp and noticed that everyone’s backpacks were sealed up tight and they were milling around, probably waiting for her and Jack so they could get started on their activities for the day. None of them were looking their way, though, so she doubted they’d seen them kiss.
“We have to go,” Jack said.
“Jack, I know you have a job to do here, and I don’t want to get in your way.”
“You can’t get in my way,” he said with a cold tone.
She felt her face fall.
“I’m sorry. Shit. See? I’m frustrated and I’m going to be a bastard to you. I know I am. I don’t remember how not to be.” He touched her arm, then dropped his hand. “I gotta stop touching you.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and then pulled them out quickly.
