Page 60 of Sweet as Sin (Bad Habit 1)
His nostrils flared. He leaned in closer to me, and now our noses were touching.
That only pissed me off more. My next words were biting.
“Number two. Until you have a freezing cold speculum shoved up inside you and winched open by ten different doctors before you find one that’s actually nice and makes you feel comfortable and knows what the hell he’s doing, you do not get to weigh in on my choice of a gynecologist. And, finally, the very important number three, stop being such an asshole!”
I spun out of his arms, retrieved the towel from the bed, rewrapped it around my body, and stood glaring at him from a few feet away.
Only after I’d done all that did it occur to me that poking an angry bear usually isn’t the best tactic.
Nico’s voice came deadly soft. “Don’t yell at me.”
I answered in the same tone. “Refer to point number three.”
He stepped closer, eyes fierce. I refused to step back. “Nico, don’t. I’m not letting you intimidate me. If you want this to go any further than today, than right this second, just don’t.”
That stopped him dead in his tracks. Looking as if I’d just slapped him, he whispered, “You’re not goin’ anywhere, Kat.”
I got so mad it was all I could do to answer him civilly. “Just to be perfectly clear: you don’t get to make that decision. I’m not your toy.”
He licked his lips. It reminded me of a nature show I’d once seen of an alpha wolf on the hunt for a caribou in the Alaskan wilderness. It didn’t end well for the caribou.
He took a measured step closer, then another, until we were a foot apart. His eyes drilled into mine. I still refused to budge. “You’re my favorite toy, baby. And I’m yours. So that makes us even.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but he interrupted me.
“That also means I’m not gonna let you walk away ’cause you got your panties in a wad about me actin’ like a man. Told you this yesterday and I’m sayin’ it again: we’re gonna give each other the benefit of the doubt. You’re pissed at me, you tell me. I think you’re bein’ a drama queen, I’m gonna tell you.”
What? Me? A drama queen?
“I can tell by that angry little noise you just made that you think I’m an even bigger asshole now that I said that, but just like you shouldn’t be afraid to speak your mind to me, I’m not gonna be afraid to speak my mind to you.” He glanced at my necklace, then back up into my eyes. “I wasn’t playin’ when I said we’re gonna have trust, Kat. It might not always be pretty.” He reached out and softly stroked my cheek. “But it is always gonna be real.”
I considered all that, then decided to go for broke. “Okay. You want real? Here it is. And if you don’t like it, you’ve only got yourself to blame.”
He waited, still tenderly stroking my cheek. I wished he wasn’t doing that, because it was messing with my righteous anger.
“I’ve had twelve lovers in my life.” His hand on my face froze. “That’s right, I said it. Twelve. Two of them were complete psychos, three of them had mommy issues, four of them were just fucking immature. The other three either cheated on me or roughed me up. One of them did both, and loved every minute of it. So that puts you at unlucky number
thirteen. And if I were judging this relationship on my past experiences, I’d be out that door so fast right now your head would spin.
“I don’t like aggression. I don’t really like possessiveness, either, but at least that shows you care. But the anger? This stuff with you going ballistic on the press, and even getting physical with your friends? That worries me, Nico. All your secrets worry me, too. But I’m standing here, telling you this, because I care. I’m looking for reasons to stay. Don’t give me any more to walk away.”
Slowly, he withdrew his hand from my face. He stared at me a long, long time, silent, his expression a mix of frustration and conflict, and what might have even been fear. He whispered, “I only have two secrets, Kat. One that could ruin my life, and one that could ruin someone else’s. If you want me to, I’ll tell you both.”
Oh. I hadn’t been expecting that. But he wasn’t finished yet.
“As for the anger, I don’t have an excuse for that. Never felt possessive about a woman before. Or jealous, either.”
Not even Avery? Not even that beautiful train wreck whose picture you keep beside your bed?
“Never,” he insisted, reading the look in my eyes. “And I’m not gonna stand here and lie to you that it’s not gonna happen again, ’cause it might. Hell, it probably will.”
When I made a noise of frustration, he reached out and grasped my wrist, pulling me nearer. “But I get you don’t like it. So I’ll do my best to curb that shit. If . . . ” he wrapped his arms around me and spoke into my ear, “you do your best not to compare me to every other fuckin’ douche bag you’ve been with. I don’t compare you to anyone else. At least give me that.”
I settled my head on his chest, listening to the steady thumping of his heart. He brushed my hair off my neck and trailed his lips across my shoulder and up my throat, pressing soft kisses as he went. My arms, having a mind of their own, wound around his waist.
I didn’t know what to think, or feel. Or do. What he’d said about his secrets unsettled me, and while I wanted to know what they were, at the same time I didn’t. I decided that, for the moment, it was enough he’d offered to share. There was only so much my brain could deal with in one day.
I sighed, defeated. “Okay. Deal. No comparisons on my end, and you keep a leash on King Kong.”
