Page 39 of Make Me Sin (Bad Habit 2)
In order to give it the proper perspective, I rewind and tell him the story, beginning from when I bumped into A.J. at Flaming Saddles last Sunday night, and ending with Friday, when I pulled the genius move of showing up unannounced at his haunted hideout. When I’m finished, Jamie is silent for so long I have to ask if he’s still there.
“What you’re describing is a man in a great deal of pain. You realize that, right, Chloe?”
He’s dead serious. He even sounds worried, like he’s warning me.
“Why do you say that?”
“Because when it’s in pain, an animal hides. And, if cornered and feeling threatened, it lashes out. Your friend is doing both.”
My lungs constrict, making it harder to breathe. “I know.”
“So here’s my piece of big-brotherly advice. Do with it what you will.”
I listen hard, my heart beating a little faster.
“Wait.”
I frown at the phone. “What do you mean, wait? He’s not going to change—”
“Not for him to change.”
“What then?”
“For him to decide what he wants more: his pain, or you.”
I drink my wine, swiping angrily at the moisture in the corner of my eye.
“And in the meantime, live your life. I’m not saying sit by the phone and pine away. I’m just saying that it might take him a minute or two to come around. You can’t push it. But the way you two looked at each other . . . I don’t think you should throw the idea out the window just yet. So just wait. Leave him alone. Let’s see what he does if he doesn’t feel cornered.”
Because this little pep talk is giving me too much hope, I blurt, “He’s into prostitutes. Like, really into them. They’re all he dates.”
Jamie calmly asks, “Male or female?”
“Female! Geez!”
“I’m just trying to get my facts straight, don’t get all excited.”
“Excuse me, but why don’t you seem more disturbed? He pays for sex.”
“Because no man in the history of the world has ever done that.”
Exasperated, I say, “Jamie, come on!”
“Would it shock you to know I’ve done the same?”
My brows shoot so far up my forehead they almost fly off. “Yes, as a matter of fact it would. When? More importantly, why?”
There’s a shrug in his voice. “Because I was horny, and lonely, and I could.”
I decide not to ask for details. “I’m sorry, I just don’t get it. The whole thing seems so seedy and pathetic to me.”
“Well, you’re not a man.”
I groan. “That’s such a sexist statement.”
“When did you become so judgmental, anyway?”
“Hello, it’s illegal? And dangerous? And totally gross?”
