Page 29 of Midnight Valentine
That often do not make sense
Hippopotamus
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: Re: Sadly…
#1 – Sir Grumpsalot?! I prefer Captain Crankypants, thank you. Unless addressing me formally, in which case you’d use my proper title of King Crabby Poo.
#2 – That is probably the best haiku ever written. Not only does it perfectly describe the art form, you worked in the word hippopotamus, which, in my opinion, is vastly underrepresented in poetry. Well done.
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: Re: Re: Sadly…
Your powers of observation are astute. I am shocked, sir, shocked that you guessed my original email was about you.
Would it be rude at this juncture to observe that I like you much more in email than in person? Though I must admit, you give good phone too.
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: YES IT WOULD BE VERY RUDE
But your poem and your devotion to the late, great David Bowie have scored you a few sympathy points. (Yes, I noticed your T-shirt, your email address, and the print of the Heroes album cover tacked to your bedroom wall. Side note: what do you think he was doing with his hands? Signaling the mother ship?)
Now if only I could be assured that you have equally good taste in guitarists as you do in singer-songwriters.
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: No need to shout, King Crabby Poo
I scoff at your challenge. It’s too easy. Top 5:
1 – BB King
2 – Les Paul
3 – Eddie Van Halen
4 – Jimmy Page
5 – Jimi Hendrix
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: Wow
How can you expect me to like someone who puts Jimi Hendrix last? I think we’re done here.
