Page 33 of Sexy Dare (The Sexy 1)

Faith winced but remained silent.

“We told him he didn’t have to do it. We each offered to walk out with him and fuck the pledge and the joining, but he was game. He wanted to be accepted so damned badly. So he drank. And drank. Then they put a backpack filled with weights on his back and made him run up and down the basement stairs. He tripped, fell backward, and smacked his head a few times on the way down.” Nausea filled his throat at the memory of the sound of his friend’s head cracking against the stairs.

Faith wrapped her arms around him as he finished the story, and he took comfort from the warmth of her cheek against his.

“I couldn’t call anyone. They’d taken our phones when we arrived and pulled out the landlines ahead of time.” He dropped to his knees, remembering his friend lying lifeless on the floor, blood coming from his head, Landon yelling at his brother to wake up, slapping his face in his attempt.

She lowered herself with him, hanging on to him for dear life.

“Then Vic … Victor Clark, who’d been in charge all along, who put the backpack on Levi and smacked his face when he tripped the first time, called us pussies and demanded we drink next.”

“What did you do?”

His eyes burned with unshed tears and his throat was raw from holding them back. “I… We picked up Levi and walked out of the house. Nobody stopped as we headed for the university hospital until finally a campus van picked us up. Levi was DOA.”

“Oh, God, Jason, I’m sorry.” She clasped her hands against his cheeks and met his gaze. “You all know it wasn’t your fault, right?”

He rolled his shoulders. “To this day, I don’t fucking know. There are so many ifs. If we hadn’t agreed to rush a frat. If we hadn’t agreed to go to the party. If we hadn’t let him drink and just turned around and went home… But none of it matters because it happened and he’s gone. But it’s the lesson I took from it that’s my point of telling you.”

She shivered despite being tight against him. “Which is what?”

“You need to understand. You asked if I wanted kids and I need to explain why I don’t. We nearly lost Sienna when she was a kid. I lost Levi. I already have a big family and I have the guys. That’s a solid handful of people to worry about already, and I vowed I wouldn’t add more.” He looked at her, regret all over his handsome face. “I can’t have more people who I could potentially lose. Kids? Yeah, that’s … more.”

* * *

Faith heard him. She even understood. Her heart broke for what he’d seen and lived through and the pain he still harbored inside him. But what he didn’t seem to understand was that he was a warm, giving man who naturally helped people … like her. Which inevitably meant bringing more people into his inner circle. But he didn’t want those connections.

He was helping her, yes, but he didn’t want to get emotionally involved. If she’d harbored any illusions after their morning in bed, he’d definitely set her straight now. All she could do was to be there for him the way he’d been there for her since the day they’d met.

“Hey.” She leaned back and looked into his red-rimmed eyes. “I get it, okay? I understand more than you could imagine. I have a complicated life that doesn’t lend toward bringing people in. My brother is dangerous. By letting anyone in, I put them in danger, too. I never wanted to do that to you but you insisted. So the truth is, I get needing to keep people at a distance.”

He remained silent, as if sensing she wasn’t finished. Which she wasn’t.

She drew a deep breath and continued. “So if you’re worried about me wanting anything more from you than the help you’re offering now, I won’t. I don’t.”

Relief crossed his face even as the word lies echoed inside her head. Of course she wanted more than he could give, because she’d fallen for her reluctant hero. But that wasn’t in the cards. She’d deal with her pain like she dealt with everything else, by throwing herself into her work and building her business.

She just needed to convince Jason he could trust her to respect his boundaries. “My plan is for my brother to end up in jail so I can go back to living my independent life.” She forced a smile. “We’re good, Jason. You’re good. Most importantly, you survived. Don’t feel guilty because you did.”

He squeezed her hand and rose to his feet, then together they headed back to the car.

Chapter Seven

Faith took her cues from Jason, who was silent on the way home after the trip to the frat house. She gave him his space, not wanting to intrude on his personal thoughts, using the time to check in with Kelsey, who had everything at the store under control. She even offered to open in the morning, and since she knew the recipes and they had nonperishable items to sell, Faith agreed.

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