Page 104 of Muse (Fighting Fate)

Silence filled the room. I had no idea what she was thinking. I couldn’t look at her to try to gauge it.

“I’m sorry, but I just want to be alone.”

She paused for a little while, then leant over and gave me a kiss on the forehead. “Okay, sweetie. Just don’t be too hard on yourself, okay? Everything will come back when the time’s right. You just need a little patience.”

I thought over her words for a long time after she left. They made me realize I probably was being a little too tough on myself. I was trying to force myself to accept something I had no way of understanding. I knew I needed to give myself time, but that was a pretty hard thing to do when you couldn’t remember how you lost your virginity.

Chapter 51

Jace

“Snap!”

I was brought back to the present for the sixth time in the last five minutes by that one little word. I looked up at Ruby’s bright smile and she giggled.

“I win!” she said excitedly.

I inhaled deeply and gave her a tiny smile. Damn she was a cutie. “Ah Ruby, you’re just too good for me today.”

I didn’t know how it was possible, but her grin grew even wider. I helped her pack up the cards and put them back in the box, and when we were done, she tucked her hand in mine. “I’m hungry.”

“Are you now? How about we go make some sandwiches?”

Her eyes sparkled. “Can I help?”

“Of course you can. Come on.”

I took her into the kitchen and lifted her onto the bench.

When Mom asked me if I could babysit that morning, I wasn’t sure if I could mentally handle it. The memory of Mia’s horrified expression from the night before was still burnt in my mind. But looking after Ruby seemed to have been just the distraction I needed. Obviously, my mind still slipped sometimes, but for most parts, she was the perfect distraction.

I let Ruby have complete control over our sandwich making project, just helping her as she needed it. The mess at the end showed just how much she loved it, but it was worth it.

We ate right where we were standing, sipping on pink milk for an added treat. Although it would’ve been heaps easier if I cleaned the mess up on my own, the amount of fun she got out of it made it worthwhile to let her help.

We were just washing the last of the dishes when the doorbell rang.

Ruby ran to open it, excited to be playing the lady of the house. She squealed when she saw Aiden standing there and launched herself into his arms. “Aidy!”

Ruby was the only person alive allowed to call him that.

“Hello, princess. Wow, look how big you’re getting!”

I rolled my eyes at him, but I grinned just the same. All the guys had a soft spot for Ruby. I sometimes wondered what she would think about it all when she was a teenager - especially if we hit the big time like we all hoped.

I walked back into the living room, knowing Aiden would follow me, and flicked on the TV. “Here you go, munchkin. You can watch the fairies before nap time okay?”

She squealed and wriggled out of Aiden’s arms to run over to the lounge. “Thanks, Jace!”

I got the show going and gave her a kiss on her forehead. “I’m just going to go talk to Aiden in the kitchen okay?”

“Okay.” She never took her eyes off the screen.

I chuckled then turned for the kitchen. Flicking the kettle on, I grabbed two mugs from the cupboard. “Coffee?”

I didn’t look at him when I asked. Having him there was only making everything rush back to me again. The ache, the despair, the loneliness. I didn’t want to feel those things.

“Thanks,” he said, sitting down at the bench.

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