Of course by then, Regina was divorced from her second husband Rex, and he too had joined Dads and Daughters. So when Jess finally turned eighteen last month, Rex and I jointly sponsored her membership. Jess was voted in unanimously, and to be honest, more than a few of our buddies offered to be her first.
There was Carl, with the big burly chest and the white smile. We hear he’s very tender with inexperienced teenagers. We also seriously considered Rocky, who has two girls of his own, both of whom went through Dads and Daughters when they hit the right age. But we finally settled on Brent because he’s known Jess since she was a child, and promised he would take good care of her.
That means a lot to us because we love our daughter. Maybe it looks like we’re introducing Jessica to a world of debauchery, and in a way we are. But it’s just another part of being a parent: would you rather your child’s first time be with some pimply teenage asshole who uses her and loses her? Or would you rather her first time be with an older, experienced man whom you’ve handpicked because he cares about your daughter?
As a result, Brent was the right choice, and he and Jess were slated to have their first official union next week. But in a turn of events, Brent has suddenly quit the group. It seems he’s been having some trouble managing his own daughter, Marni, and dropped out as a result.
It’s too bad because I was looking forward to inducting Marni, and maybe even offering to be her first. She’s a curvaceous brunette with a generous décolletage and a bottom that you could park a car in. She comes off as a little shy, but I like the shy ones. The timid ones with the innocent looking expressions always turn out to be the dirtiest whores after you get them going.
But Brent’s departure has left my daughter hanging, and she makes a face at us while standing at the table with a face full of make-up.
“Jessie, things are going to be fine,” Rex reassures her. “We’ll find you someone else for your first time. There are dozens of good men in the club.”
Jess gets a determined look on her face, and stamps her bare foot.
“No, I want Brent,” she says stubbornly. “I’ve had my heart set on him for years now, and I want him to be the one.”
This is a dirty conversation between a daughter and her dads, but it is what it is. I shrug and look at Rex. He’s a handsome asshole with black as night hair, blue eyes and a thick, wide chest. We all work out like animals because driving a truck for twelve hours a day is a physically demanding job. Taking care of our bodies is the only way a man can survive.
He takes the opening.
“Jess, Brent quit yesterday. There’s nothing we can do about it, at least not before your induction next week. But trust me, there are dozens of great candidates who would be more than happy to show you how to be a woman. Carl is going to be in town next week, as is Rocky Cunningham. Do you remember Rocky? Big guy with the deep laugh? He’s got two girls of his own, and he’d show you a good time.”
But Jess isn’t having it. Her face turns red and she stamps her foot again. Right now, she’s reminding me of a five year old brat throwing a temper tantrum.
“No, Dad! I don’t want some guy I’ve never met before. I want Brent. I’ve wanted him for years now, and you can’t take him away from me.”
I cut in.
“Sweetheart, we didn’t do anything. You’d still be with Brent if we had anything to do with it, but he quit of his own accord. What do you want us to do? Carl and Rocky are very nice men, and you’ll have a great time with them. In fact, they might be even better than Brent, come to think of it.”
But Jessica won’t even entertain the thought. Her head bobbles up and down angrily, and her ponytail swings.
“No. I don’t want some strange man. I want Brent. And you can make it happen, Tex and Rex. I talked to Marni today, and she said she wants to be in Dads and Daughters. It’s just that Brent has some hang-up about her joining, so to prevent her from joining, he preemptively quit.”
That’s news to my ears, and Rex and I share a puzzled look.
“Seriously?” my friend growls.
Jessica nods emphatically.
“Yes. Marni’s actually totally on-board, but her dad thinks she’s not a good fit for the group. I have no idea why, because if anyone would benefit from Dads and Daughters, it’s Marni. She’s never even been on a date before! But from what she told me, her dad thinks she’s too “dorky,” “nerdy,” and “unprepared.” His words, not mine.”