Page 23 of Outlaw

Dana sighs. I can tell this is a woman who’s been through a lot. But at the same time, didn’t Christian say his parents were abusive? Both of them? If that’s true, what are we doing having coffee with his mom?

“Up and down,” she replies. “Going through a lot of life changes now with your father gone.”

“Father gone?” I ask, turning to him with concern. But as soon as the question leaves my mouth, I regret it. Dana looks at me, then frowns at her son.

“You haven’t told her yet?” she asks.

“I was waiting for the right time,” Christian replies. Man, I am really screwing up today.

“Oh, sorry,” Dana replies.

“You don’t have to apologize,” I assure her. “It’s me and my big mouth and assumptions that needs to apologize.”

Dana just smiles back at me. I can tell she’s hurting inside, and for the first time since I met Christian, I feel like I’m a stranger on the fringes of his life. I realize there’s so much I don’t know about him.

“Heart attack,” he says simply.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he replies. “He was a real son of a bitch.”

“Don’t say that,” Dana says. “He was your father.”

“Yeah, a shit father,” Christian replies. “Who used to beat the shit out of me. You really going to defend him, Mom?”

Christian’s voice is strong and loud. A group of highschoolers look over at us from their table. I pat him on the knee, trying to get him to calm down.

“Life is complicated,” his mom replies.

“Yeah? Is that why you let him hit me? Is that why you hit me, Mom?”

“Christian—” Dana protests. I don’t know why I feel bad for her after hearing this, but I do. She looks lost, like a woman with deep regrets.

“Forget it,” Christian says, quickly standing. “I don’t even know why I agreed to this. I’ll know better next time.” Turning to me, he says, “Come on, let’s go.”

Before I can say anything, he has me by the hand and is pulling me to the door. I glance over my shoulder at Dana, but she’s already leaning on the table with her head in her hands. The sight pulls at my heartstrings, and as we get back in the truck, I’ve already got tears welling up in my eyes.

“Christian, I—”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he snaps.

“Are you sure? I just want to help…”

He doesn’t answer. We drive in silence back to the bunker, but when we arrive, he doesn’t get out with me.

“You’re not coming in?” I ask.

“I have some things to do,” he says. “I’ll be back later.”

And with that, he drives away.

As I stand there watching him go, I wonder if I’ve made a mistake. I jumped into the deep water of this relationship without even looking to see if it was safe. Christian may be gorgeous, charming, strong, protective, and incredible in bed, but I also really know nothing about him and he obviously doesn’t want to open up and tell me.

He’s a rugged outlaw who’s seen more of the world than I could ever dream of, and I’m a sheltered, naïve girl who thought serving drinks to a gang of bikers was a good idea. Maybe…maybe this just isn’t meant to be.

15

Christian

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