Page 37 of Valentine Dare

I sighed as I sunk into the couch.

“Yeah, you know how to make me laugh.”

“And you have three boyfriends, and none of them know how to make you laugh?”

She bounced right next to me. She did everything with such exaggeration, even tossing her bag to the side and nearly knocking over the lamp.

“Shoot, I shouldn’t have done that!”

I agreed. “No, you shouldn’t have.”

“Mom’s always complaining that I’m such a slob.”

“She’s not the only one.”

“Hey,” she said as she slapped my arm. “You shouldn’t be saying things like that. You should be saying, no Tracey, you’re the neatest person I know.”

“Oh, so now you want me to lie.”

She nodded. “Yeah, that doesn’t sit well with me.” She clapped her hand and made such a noise, I shrieked. “What are we doing today?”

“We could go to your place. I mean, this house is nice, and I love staying here, but it’s not really mine. If you know what I mean.”

“Sounds like a plan. Both parents are at the hospatal. They have some crazy shift, so I know they won’t be back till late. We can make milkshakes and just hang out. I can even teach you how to dance!”

I slapped her arm again, “That’s such a stereotype! I mean if anyone needs to know how to dance, it’s you. I saw the way you were moving the last time we played Just Dance. You need some moves, girl.”

She covered her face. “Oh no, now you’re talking like me and yeah, you’re right I’m the one who’s stiff as a carrot, so my dad likes to say whenever we play together. Come on. Sounds like a plan, but just one thing.”

“What?”

“You need to get out of those jamies. No wonder the guys are all over you like a wet blanket. You walk around all day like you’re so innocent in your Minnie Mouse hot pants PJs showing those nipples and breasts all day.”

I winked at her. “Maybe you should try it, and you could have three boyfriends too.”

She clutched her breasts. “Shit, I have enough titty for four!”

We both laughed as I jumped off the couch and decided to take a quick shower.

“You know it’s kind of sad. Until now, I never felt the need to study. Sure, I know that education is important, but when you don’t know what you want to be in life, there just isn’t the motivation to do it.”

She smiled. “Doesn’t mean you should settle for being dumb. I mean, I don’t mean to be harsh, but you didn’t feel the need to study ‘cause you were rich. If the mess with your dad gets cleared, you’ll go back to not feeling that need. My parents have showed me the struggles they had before they went to medical school. What they had to fight to get to where they are today. They wanted me to be tough in a world that doesn’t allow us to succeed.”

I said, “Things aren’t that bad. I mean, we’ve come a long way since segregation.”

“True, but it doesn’t mean that racism doesn’t exist. The guys will tell you, hey it’s not her skin that makes her different from us. It’s something else. But underneath it all, they don’t even know what it is, because they’ve never had to deal with it. I’m a black girl in an all-white school full of rich kids. Even the poor one’s are still a lot richer than what my parents grew up with. They can’t even take me back to their neighborhood. They just show me movies and photos of their past. How bad is that?”

I sat next to her and put my hand on hers. “Shit, that’s rough.”

She jerked my hand. “See, you’re doing it. The thing you do once in a while. I know you mean well, but please don’t do that poor-black-girl thing. Just rubs me up the wrong way. I’m just telling you about the way things are, not so you’re sad and put your head to the side like you’re doing now.”

“I can’t win!” I said, throwing my hands up in the air.

“Do you want me to listen and not feel shitty about the situation, or you want me to feel proud of it?”

“I want you to get dressed, come to my house, and I’ll show you the photos and we’ll watch movies so you can get acquainted with the topic. Sound like a deal?”

I nodded my head as I stood up. “Sure, I’m up for how to stop feeling white and privileged and get on with things in the real world. Brent told me that I lived in a bubble, and I keep fitting that feeling, the one that tells me he’s right, but as much as I fight it, I keep coming back to his words and realizing he’s right.”

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