Page 30 of Kayden: The Past
12
Meet Me in St. Louis - Danielle
This had been a mistake.I came to St. Louis without Danielle. I had training and needed to find a place to live while she packed up our belongings. The problem with St. Louis was where I lived and with whom I lived. The house was stuffed with eight guys who all worked for the same company. They’d left their wives behind for quick money and flew home periodically. It was a frat house filled with temptation.
I bought a work truck and the tools I needed to get the job done. The days were long and grueling out in the elements. I did like the work. I didn’t think I’d like it as much as working sales, but I liked working with my hands and being outdoors. I wasn’t tied to a single space; the city was my workplace.
I missed Danielle, missed the life we had together. I didn’t know where anything was in this fucking city. I had my road map and had to study it at every turn. It slowed me down. I kept her and our time together in my thoughts to help me make it through the day.
I was so lost in my daydream, driving to my next job, I almost missed my exit. I quickly cut across three lanes of traffic to just make it and avoid an extra half hour of driving. Sirens immediately filled the air. I shook my head.Naturally, there would be a cop to see me.I pulled off to the side of the exit and rolled down my window.
He approached my truck with his hand on his gun. “Sir, license and registration, please.” I reached over and grabbed my wallet off the seat.
“I’m sorry, officer. I’m new to the city. I didn’t mean to do that.”
“License, please.” He held out his hand and didn’t want to engage in small talk, I guess. I handed him my license and watched him walk away and climb back into his car.
I had a bad feeling about him. He didn’t seem to be the type to give me just a warning. I hoped he would, but my license was still registered in Ohio. I hadn’t lied to him. The wait felt like an eternity as he returned with his pad of paper.
“I’m giving you a ticket for reckless driving.” I closed my eyes trying to not let my temper flare. “You can pay it at the police station or go to court.” He tore the yellow piece of paper off the pad and stuck it through the window with my license.
“No warning?”
“No, sir. It was reckless of you to cut across the highway in that manner. You could’ve caused an accident. There is no leniency for that.”
I took the paper and threw it on the front seat. Pissed didn’t even begin to describe what I felt. I waited for him to return to his car before continuing on my way. I had a full day ahead of me and couldn’t let this get to me.
I got more pissed the more I thought about the fucking ticket. Why couldn’t some cops ever give a guy a break? I was just trying to make a living and find my way through this maze of a city. I had four jobs ahead of me and wouldn’t be done until well after dark.
I walked through the door after nine, exhausted and dirty from crawling through attics and climbing on roofs. The guys were gathered in the living room and dining room, drinking and eating dinner. Everyone finished late and came home starving and thankful the day was over.
“Drink, Kayden?” one of the guys asked. I thought about it for a moment. I had a couple of drinks here and there, but tonight, it was the only thing I wanted to do. I needed it.
“Yeah, I’ll take one.” I watched as he filled the cup with more Jack than Coke. I drank it quicker than I planned. My thirst and hunger for the buzz overcame my willpower. I was weak, and I had no other excuse.
The night slipped away, and my cup was never empty. These guys could drink in volume. Most of them walked through the door at night with their gas station cups already infused with liquor. Work all day, drink all night, and repeat. That was the life of a cable guy, and I felt myself slipping into the pattern.
I opened my eyes to a blaring light above my bed. I didn’t remember coming into my bedroom or falling asleep. I just remembered laughing and drinking. The alarm was blasting in the room, and everyone was starting to move around the apartment. I looked at my phone. I’d missed five calls from Danielle.
The phone rang four times before I heard her sleepy voice, “Hello.”
“Baby, sorry I missed your calls last night.” I closed my eyes and waited for her response.
I could hear her exhale into the receiver, but it wasn’t a happy sound. “What the fuck happened to you last night, Kayden? You always call me.”
“I’m sorry. I got home so late from work, and the guys were sitting around talking. I fell asleep.”
“Were you drinking?”
I swallowed hard and thought about lying, but I just couldn’t do it. “I had one.”
“Which means you had five, Kayden. You’ve never fallen asleep and forgotten to call me. I thought you were with someone else and not passed out in bed.”
“I fucked up, babe. I wasn’t with anyone. I’m only yours. I need to be with you. It’s been too long since I’ve touched you. When will you be here?” I wanted to change the subject.
“I’ll be there next week. Is the apartment going to be ready?”
“Yes, I have it all set up with the landlord. It’s furnished, so we just need our personal stuff. It’s not fancy, but I don’t care as long as you’re with me.”
