Page 67 of Chasin' Cole

"Come on, Rose" Cole playfully groans as he holds his hand out for me.

I take a deep breath. "I don't know."

"It's just one ride down the snowy embankment. It won't kill you," he flashes his eyebrows at me.

It might, Cole. It just might.

"Fine," I grumble as I grab his hand. Cole steadies me as I slip between his legs. My butt connects with plastic beneath me as his strong arms wrap around me.

I ignore the light-headedness, my blood thrummin' from the proximity of his body close to mine.

He rocks us forward and we teeter over the edge of the hillside before barrelin' down.Down, down, down.

Trees and other sledders pass by as I throw my head back against Cole's shoulder and scream. The sound of his gruff laughter fills my ears as he holds me tighter against him. I revel in his warmth, in how steady his arms seem.

Seem.

They seem strong and steadfast, but I know they aren't. I know how much it hurts when he lets go.

The wind whips through my hair. I reach up and pull my beanie further down my forehead as the sinkin' realization that just because he's here again, doesn't mean he's here to stay.

I don't know what to do with that anymore. He leaves. He comes home. He leaves again. What does anyone do with that?

"Uh oh," I hear Cole say.

I turn to look up at him, but it's too late. We hit a bump, and both go flyin' off the sled. I land in the snow a few feet from Cole.

He lifts his head to make sure I’m OK before rolling over to me. I try to keep from laughin' as he swiftly reaches me, his jacket white from the dusting of snow.

"Are you alright?" he asks me as he sits up and runs his hand over my shoulder, down my arm, then down my leg.

"I'm alright," I answer as I peer up at him from the snowy ground I'm still layin' on.

He moves closer and uses his teeth to pull the glove off his hand. His fingers are warm as they graze my cheek. "Are you sure?"

My throat clogs and my eyes sting. No, I'm not alright. I’m not OK with him being this close to me. I'm not fine with the way he left. I'm not alright with how much I've missed him.

"I'll be fine," I lie.

He frowns as his hand cups my cheek. "I've been such a coward, Rose."

What?

"I never should have left the way I did," he continues. "I should have told you how important you are to me. I should have given you my grandmother's ring and promised you forever before I left. I...am I too late?"

I blink slowly up at him, wonderin' if he's hit his head. "Do you have a concussion?”

He chuckles. "I'm fine. I've missed you and I want to make it all up to you. Let me make it up to you, Rose."

"I don't know," I honestly answer. "What happens when you leave again?"

"I don't have any contracts in the works. I...they offered me another job, but I declined. I want to be where you are," he licks his lips nervously.

"But I'm...you can't give up your whole life for me," I tell him.

"I'm tired of always living out of a suitcase, Rose," he strokes my cheek with his fingertips. "I don't want to do it anymore."

"I don't understand," I shake my head as I prop myself up on my elbow.

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