Page 74 of Something Old

ChapterTwenty-Five

One month later and Delaney was back at work, yet it all felt different. She was different. Sadness remained, but she had lived with that for years. She kept telling herself that she had gotten the closure she never had in the past. Yes, it broke her heart, but her heart had never really healed from the first time, so it was more adding insult to injury than a true break.

Her boss had promoted her to the head of events at the museum, the board finally stopping their objections to her. She sensed William Van Owen’s hand in that, forcing Kira to back off and leave her alone. As a result, she had a new office, additional responsibilities, but it wasn’t enough. She still felt empty inside, as if she were sleepwalking through her life.

Her mother strolled around the office, running her hands over the pressed wood file cabinet and windowsills.

“It’s much brighter than your old one, and a much better view.”

“Considering my old view was an alley, the dumpster, and a brick wall, it wasn’t hard to improve upon that.”

Her mother still avoided her gaze. “Still, the light is pleasant and the gardens are beautiful. You could add some flowers and a few pictures to make it more homey.”

Delaney sighed. “Mom, you’re not here for decorating advice. Why are you really here?”

Susan perched on the chair in front of the desk, making eye contact for the first time. “I wanted to apologize.”

Delaney arched an eyebrow. “Now you want to apologize? After embarrassing me with that article, dredging up the past that should have remained buried forever.”

Susan’s hands twisted in her lap, strangling the straps of her Coach bag, eyes downcast. Silence lengthened, bird songs filling the air. So much better than the garbage trucks that Delaney had grown accustomed to.

Finally, the hands stilled, and Susan sighed, meeting Delaney’s gaze for the first time. “I know you don’t understand why I did it, but I had to. It was time to let go of everything.”

“So, you had to do it publicly? Why can’t you go to therapy for five years like everyone else?”

“You made it clear we didn’t have the money for therapy.” Susan sighed again. “No, that’s not why. I needed to take control of my life. I’d been wallowing for years, dragging everyone down with me. Dragging you down.”

“That sounds like Aunt Trudy.”

Susan shrugged. “She shook me out of the doldrums, pointing out how selfish I’d been acting.”

“So, you decided to air our dirty laundry again to make yourself feel better? How is that not selfish?” Anger burned in Delaney, anger that had built inside from five years of suppressing, of hiding, of doing what was needed to get through the days.

“I don’t expect you to understand, although I would have thought you would try. I shut down back then, letting our lawyers and your father do all the talking. I was the good, little supportive wife, standing by her man. That was my role. But your father didn’t hold up his end of the bargain.”

“He died. I don’t think he could control that.” The words kept coming, and Delaney couldn’t stop them.

Her mother’s face twisted at the verbal blow, but she straightened in the chair, not running like she used to. “No, he couldn’t, but I abdicated my role as your mother, forcing you to step up, which you did wonderfully.” Her mother leaned forward and gripped Delaney’s hand. “But that was my job. And I failed.”

The anger drained out of Delaney at those words. She grasped her mother’s hand. “I understand, Mom. I really do. You shouldn’t have done the article. Nothing good can come of it.”

Susan shook her head. “That’s not the point. I needed to stand up for myself and take charge of my life, finally. Did you actually read the article?”

Delaney shook her head. “God, no. I had to live it. The timing couldn’t have been worse.”

“I know and I’m sorry for that. But it’s over now.” Susan squared her shoulders. “I’m moving to Arizona. And I think you should come too.”

Delaney stared at her mother. “What?”

“Houston has too many memories for all of us. Trudy and I found a nice community in Arizona. You could move there too. Find a job that you really love.”

Delaney shook her head, still amazed that her mother was taking such a big step. “And where would I live, in a retirement community? I’m about thirty years too young for that. And I just got my promotion.”

“Right. You are too young. But you’ve been acting like your life is over. Why don’t you talk to him?”

Delaney’s hands dropped to her lap. And the hits just kept on coming. For the past several years, she’d been wishing that someone would take the responsibilities away, wishing she didn’t have to worry about money for her mother’s care, their household expenses. Now, with those suddenly being taken away, what was left? Her life seemed so empty now, with everything taken away from her, even if she had prayed for this moment. And then to mention Ethan. The name was a sucker punch to her heart.

Susan reached out and lifted Delaney’s chin, like the mother she remembered from her youth. “You did good, Delaney. You kept us going and I’m grateful. But it’s time for you to live your life.”

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