Page 37 of Monsters Within (The Creatures We Crave 1)
I had assumed their true forms were their preference and that it felt like they were stuffed away when inside their human one.
Lifting the comforter, he eased underneath, and he placed his arm around me as I settled my head down onto his chest with ease. It was like our bodies already knew exactly how the other would move, like old lovers.
“I hope you don’t think that I don’t want you in your true form,” I whispered as I dragged my fingers along his abdomen absentmindedly, enjoying the feel of his skin.
I had made so many mistakes since they’d come to my reality, making them doubt my feelings and themselves in the fact that we didn’t quite know where they came from. I couldn’t bear to make them doubt this too. I loved them for the monsters they were, the ones that had been there for me my whole life, not because of their handsome human forms.
As he trailed his fingers up and down my arm, I couldn’t help but shiver at the gentle touch. “I wouldn’t be able to do this in my monster form,” he answered easily, with no ounce of resentment or sadness in his tone. “At first it was uncomfortable to be in this human form for so long, but the longer we stay in it, the more natural it feels. It is nice to be able to switch back and stretch out like normal, so to speak,” he explained, “but overall, I prefer to be in the form that I don’t have to fear hurting you in.”
Snuggling my head further into the crook between his chest and neck, I sighed in contentment. “I want to be clear that I love you in whatever form you are in.”
Beneath me, his muscles tensed, and my body's immediate reaction was to pull away, but his grip around me was hard, holding me in place. “Please,” he ground out, like he was struggling to speak, “please don’t move. I want to remember this moment.”
My eyes tracked around the room as I tried to understand what he meant by that, until it finally clicked.
I’d just admitted out loud that I loved him. Holy shit.
Sure, we’d said it in my stories, but with his reaction, it was painfully obvious that we both felt as if this was the real first time it had happened. Whether that meant he accepted their memories hadn’t been reality was beyond my knowledge.
“Uhm,” I started, awkwardly wiggling against him, uncomfortable with the silence. “I meant that—”
Two seconds later, I was flat on my back with his large frame boxing me in beneath him as he tenderly moved a strand of my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear. “Don’t take it back,” he pleaded. “Say it again.”
My heart hammered wildly in my chest, and suddenly my brain was scrambled eggs, trying to overthink the situation, per usual.
Stop, Alexandra. Stop thinking about everything other than what you feel in your heart.
I promised myself that in this new chapter in our lives, I would let go. So I did.
“I love you,” I breathed out as butterflies erupted in my stomach.
It was true. I loved him, Kylo, and Lucien. They had always been by my side as my constant supporters, even when I thought them just a figment of my imagination. They never allowed me to feel alone, even in the worst moments of my life.
There had been days where it felt pointless, like there would never be a place for me to feel accepted and loved. But they always brought me back from the brink, reminding me that I was strong enough to face anything, over and over again.
They were right. I was strong enough, and I would conquer any challenge placed in front of me.
I had found true love without even knowing it.
I had fallen in love with my best friends, and they were real.
They had accepted all the broken pieces of me that I had revealed to them over the years, and had picked the pieces back up, putting them back in place and holding them there when I wasn’t able to do it myself.
The smile that pulled at his lips instantly drew the same from me as my soul finally felt free for the first time, completely bare with no walls. My skin pebbled in delight despite my brow beading with perspiration.
So this was what it felt like to love and be loved, unconditionally.
The next thing I knew, his lips were on my forehead and he was murmuring, “I love you for the way you think of others and not just yourself.”
Trailing lower, he dropped a kiss over my eyes as they drifted shut. “I love you for the way you see the world for what it is but still have hope within you for it to be better.”
At times it felt like I had given up on that, but he was right. Deep down, I’d always held out a kernel of hope that the world would change. It was like an itch I could never quite scratch, always prevalent and on my mind.
I popped my eyes open just as he pressed a kiss to my lips. “I love you for the way you speak what is on your mind, even if it isn’t what others want to hear.”
A chuckle escaped me as I whispered, “Like telling Lucien he has to share me with you guys?”
His chest rumbled with an internal laugh as he shook his head and rolled his eyes in mock annoyance.
