“You weren’t here when I left the first time,” I pointed out. She had been starting her first year at Bowing’s.
“Does that matter?”
I didn’t say anything to that, because it didn’t matter. In fact, her going away to school so far away made it easier for me to hide. That was, until Ethan found me.
I shook my head. “I’m sorry if this upsets you. But it’s time I start doing things for myself. And I really do think taking this job is good for me.”
“Will you be happy, Evelyn?” Ethan asked, surprising everyone at the table.
I looked at him for the first time since we sat down. My heart tugged painfully at the defeated look in my brother’s eyes.
“I would like to try to be, and I think this will really help me,” I answered honestly.
He nodded. “Then it’s settled. Evelyn is moving to New York in two weeks, and we should all support her and not make her feel bad about the decision, okay?”
He gave Emilia a sharp look, who closed her mouth.
I turned to my dad. “What do you think?”
I knew he would have a hard time letting me go. He had a hard time letting me move out of the house and into the city. Now, I was moving away. Not far, by any means, but far enough that I couldn’t easily see him if I wanted to.
“This is what you want?”
I nodded.
“Then I just have one thing to ask.”
Again, I nodded, ignoring the wetness in his eyes.
“Can you please tell me what happened six years ago to make you so sad, sweetheart? Tell me what happened to my little girl.”
The desperation in his voice almost made me cave. Never had the words felt heavier on my tongue then they did then. I had wanted to tell him so many times in the past, so sure he would be able to come in and fix everything.
But I wasn’t his little girl anymore. I hadn’t been in a long time. And he couldn’t fix it.
Telling him wouldn’t do anything but make him sad.
I shook my head. “Nothing, Dad. Nothing happened. I took a job that required me to live away for a while. But that’s all in the past now.”
I worked hard to keep my gaze on him, ignoring the way the disappointment in his eyes weighed me down.
I didn’t know which was worse, the fact that he knew I was lying, or the fact that he didn’t call me out on it. I didn’t know if I could continue to keep up the façade if he did call me out.
He nodded. “Okay, sweetheart. You have my support.”
I smiled my thanks and turned to Emilia. “I don’t want to leave knowing you’re mad at me. I need my little sister’s support.”
She didn’t say anything for a while, and Katie grabbed my hand underneath the table. I squeezed it in mine.
“I’m not happy. It feels like we’ve barely talked to each other these past few years. I was really looking forward to moving back home. I wanted to hang out with my sister again, and now you’re moving away?”
“I have to do this, Em.” So badly. I really needed to do this.
She nodded, though her eyes still looked sad. “Yeah, you have my support.”
I relaxed back in my chair and smiled. I could work with that. I could move to New York, and I could do it by myself.
I could try to be happy.
And I hoped to God I wouldn’t come to regret it.