Page 70 of You Weren't Mine Then

“You know that those who care about you and your parents aren’t buying the rumors. Everyone knows who you are and who Avery is, and some remember Finn, too. If I can help in any way …”

“Not everybody, Libby. We’ve had cancellations, and I have a feeling—”

“My mom told me. It’s a small fraction. Probably the old busybodies who have nothing better to do.” Libby would know something about it. The problems her father had caused, which had culminated in Connie selling the bakery to the Drechers, had evoked gossip. “Anyway, if you need anything …”

“Thanks, Libby.”

Finn called and texted every day.

“It’s quiet. Weirdly quiet,” he said over a video chat at night. He looked tired and older. “Max doesn’t want to talk about it beyond the little we did speak about it. Avery is behaving normally, which means that I don’t hear from her. She’s in touch with Max, but it seems to be the regular stuff. I won’t go through his phone, but I tried to gauge from him if there was … Anyway, there wasn’t. It’s like nothing happened, and this worries me the most.” He was leaning against his bed’s headboard. She had great memories of that headboard. His dark gray T-shirt accentuated the blue of his eyes but also the dark circles around them. It stretched across his athletic chest and shoulders, and she imagined leaning her head on him and listening to his heartbeat. They shouldn’t video-chat. Seeing him made it harder.

Finn looked away and swiped a hand over his ruffled hair toward his neck. “My lawyer is drafting an agreement that will formalize Max living with me. I asked him not to do anything with it for now, except prepare it. It’d be poking the bear if I bring it up now.”

She sighed. “God, Finn, what have we done?”

His blue eyes pierced her through the screen. “We’ve done nothing. The more I think about it, the more I’m sure, and the more I’m beating myself over waiting and wasting three fucking years.”

“Oh, sure, it would have flown great with everyone if we got together soon after your divorce.”

“Okay, so not three years, but two years ago, when you came back, I should have ...”

“What was was, was was.”

He laughed. “What?”

God, she missed that husky sound. “I heard it somewhere.”

“You have no idea how much I miss you.” He skimmed his eyes over her face through the camera. “I’m coming over this weekend. The only text I got from Avery was to ask that I bring Max earlier on Friday, right after practice.”

“I don’t know if it’s a good idea, Finn.”

“I don’t give a damn, Jane. I have to see you. I’ll just warn her not to poison him. And I’ll tell him again that he can ask me anything, and if he needs me, he just has to call or text.”

He was the best dad any child could want, and she wanted him to be the father of any child of hers. The clinic had called just that week, and she had told them that she’d be in touch if it was relevant. Experience had taught her to anticipate the bad, to be torn from him. Now, with this looming over their heads, she didn’t want to completely shut that door.

On Friday afternoon, she opened her front door to a chlorine-smelling Finn, who had come straight from the pool. His dark blond hair was still somewhat wet, and the muscles under the long-sleeved Henley were even harder than usual. His mouth was on hers before she could say more than, “Hi.”

“I didn’t even stop to take a shower after practice. I reek,” he mumbled against her mouth between kisses. He took his shirt off and threw it on the floor. Kissing her neck, he grabbed under her thighs and lifted her. With her legs wrapped around him, he walked them to her shower. Maybe they shouldn’t be meeting until things cleared up, but he was her weakness and her strength, and she needed him as much as he needed her. With him here, her shredded heart felt whole again.

“My sunflower girl,” he whispered against her skin as he slid down her wet body and kissed the tattoo on her hipbone.

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