Page 33 of Those Summer Nights (Sweet Cravings 2)

I didn't want his hands to leave me. I didn't want him to stop kissing me. "J.J."

"I...I'm sorry, Mila." He turned and ran down the stairs.

"J.J.!"

He hopped on his motorcycle and sped off into the rain, leaving me a wet mess on the porch.

Chapter 9

Sunday

I traced my lips with the tips of my fingers as I stared at a list of universities in the northeast. It would be crazy to transfer schools for someone I just met. I knew that. But there were a lot of other reasons to transfer too. I was miserable at SMU. I was miserable in California in general. Even if I’d never met J.J., I would have at least looked at this possibility.

I stopped touching my lips. That wasn’t true. I’d waited until the day after J.J. kissed me to look up new universities. Which meant I was doing it for him. I bit the inside of my lip as I looked at tuition prices for some of the colleges I recognized in New York. It didn’t hurt to do a little research. And regardless of J.J., I was committing myself to a year of depression if I went back to Cali.

My eyes almost bugged out of my head when I started reading the tuition prices. One of them was almost $60,000 a year. Were they fucking kidding me? Not to mention the cost of living in NYC would be astronomical.

I sighed and leaned back on my pillow. It was stupid to look. I had a great scholarship to SMU. Aiden would be gone in the fall, so it wasn’t like I was going to run into him. And all his friends had just graduated too. I’d be able to start over. I’d meet new people and make new friends. I thought of J.J. and Kristen. They were both more fun than anyone I’d met at SMU. Ugh.

I glared at the ridiculous tuition costs. Even with a decent scholarship, which was unlikely since I would be applying so late, any school in New York would be more expensive than SMU even before you factored in the cost of living. Which meant I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t going to call my dad and ask him for more money. And I wasn’t exactly making lifechanging money at Sweet Cravings three days a week. I glanced over at Kristen who was still sleeping soundly.

Just because a school in New York wasn’t an option, it didn’t mean I still couldn’t transfer. After all, J.J. was absolutely not a factor in this decision. Definitely not. Kristen went to a college nearby. I typed the University of New Castle into google. A state school even without a scholarship might be cheaper than SMU was. Which meant I wouldn’t have to bother my dad and I wouldn’t have to be in hell for one more year. And I wouldn’t have to say goodbye to Kristen at the end of the summer.

I clicked on the University of New Castle’s undergraduate admissions page. My eyes scanned the information about transfers. Right above the application button there was a note that space was limited for fall admissions based on major. I still didn’t even know what I wanted my degree to be in. I’d bounced around so much at SMU that I was close to having enough credits for three different majors. I clicked on the link anyway just to see if they listed the majors where there was still room. No luck. And the page said that the normal deadline for fall applications was May 1st. So whatever spaces they had left were probably very limited. If I was going to do it, I needed to do it soon.

I glanced over at my phone. If I’d had J.J.’s number, I would have called him to talk about it. Yesterday at dinner he acted like he wanted me to transfer. He kissed me. It was possible that we were exactly on the same page. But…I didn’t have his number.

My fingers went back to my lips. No one had ever kissed me the way he had. It didn’t matter that he apologized and ran off. He did that because of what I’d told him about focusing on myself this summer. The next time I saw him, I was going to tell him I’d changed my mind. This summer didn’t have to be all about me. It could be about us. And a few states between us in the fall was a lot better than a whole country between us. If he was willing to try long distance, we could make it work. We had all summer to figure out logistics.

I stared back at my screen. It was only $75 to apply. I’d eat ramen noodles for a few days and I’d never miss the money. I clicked on the big blue button labeled APPLY NOW.

***

My application was completed, minus the essay portion. The question I had to answer was, “Why do you want to transfer to the University of New Castle?” And it needed to be 500 words or less. I had somehow written a 3,000 word essay about Aiden cheating on me, how I was a total loser, how the beach didn’t smell the same on the west coast, and how I was kinda sorta falling for a lifeguard.

None of it was acceptable for an admissions essay. It was more of a rant. I backspaced for what felt like the millionth time. Why do I want to transfer to the University of New Castle? I let the question roll around in my head. Delaware was home to me. And for the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel alone. That was the honest truth. I deleted everything I had written and started typing again.

***

“I have to kill him, don’t I?” Kristen asked.

I wiped the tears from beneath my eyes. I hadn’t realized that Kristen had woken up. “What? No.”

“But he made you cry.” She sat down on the edge of my bed. “What the heck happened on your date that made you wake up like this?” She waved her hand not just at my face but in front of my whole body.

I glanced down at my pajamas. There was absolutely nothing wrong with them. She was starting to think she was a fashionista after watching so much Project Runway.

“I’m not crying because of yesterday.” I wiped away my remaining tears. I had pretended to be asleep when she came home last night. For just a few hours, I wanted to keep what happened between J.J. and I to myself. But if she had seen me when I got home, she’d know my tears weren’t over him. And she certainly wouldn’t be threatening to kill him. “I actually had a really great time.”

“So what is this?” She did the thing with her hands again.

“I’m going to pretend you’re just asking why I’m crying, and not insinuating that I’m a hot mess.” I turned my laptop toward her. “Can you read this and tell me if it’s okay?”

Her eyes started scanning my essay. “You’re applying to the University of New Castle?” She looked up way before she could have possibly finished the essay. “You’re applying to the University of New Castle!” She leaned forward and threw her arms around me. “Mila, we’re going to have so much fun there together.”

I laughed and hugged her back. “I don’t even know if I’ll get in. Applications are past due, but they have a few spots open on a case by case basis.” I released her from my hug. “So I need this essay to be perfect.”

“Right.” Kristen looked back down at my computer screen. A few minutes later she lifted her head. “Is this really how you felt? I mean…I know you said it, but…now I feel it. I’m so sorry, Mila.”

---