“And that dress is sexy as sin. And…” her hand hesitated on the price tag. “Jesus, is he loaded?”
“No. I don’t know.” I shook my head. “I mean…I don’t think so.”
“Well, he has expensive taste.” She winked at me. “It looks like there’s something else in the box.”
I glanced back down. It did look like there was something else beneath the tissue paper. I pushed the paper to the side and looked down at a rolling pin. Oh my God, he really does understand me. I smiled and picked up the second note.
You keep talking about rolling pins and I have no idea if it’s some sexual innuendo I don’t get or if you really want one for actual rolling pin usage. Either way, maybe you can teach me how to use it later.
-Your lifeguard
I could feel my face turning bright red.
Kristen laughed from where she was peering at the note over my shoulder. “What kind of kinky things do you like to do with rolling pins?”
“Nothing!” I slid the note back into its envelope. “I just happened to mention that we didn’t have a rolling pin here. For cooking.”
“It doesn’t seem like that’s what he heard.”
I laughed. “Then he heard wrong.” But my mind was going a mile a minute. I could think of a few sexy things to do with a rolling pin.
“Well I already agreed to give you two the apartment tonight. So you can test out whatever theory you have running around in your head. But…” she drew out the word in a way that I knew she was about to ask for something. And since it was Kristen, I knew it was going to be food related.
“I already made a lasagna this morning. It’s in the fridge, just preheat the oven to…” I stopped talking when she scrunched her nose up. I wasn’t even sure she knew how to turn on the oven.
“I have an idea,” she said. “You pre-heat the oven and all that. And I’ll help you get ready. You actually need to wear makeup with a dress like that. And heels! Heels are a must!” She started rummaging around in my closet before I had time to stop her.
But she was right. I didn’t want the apartment to catch fire and I did want to look my best tonight. I smiled down at the dress and rolling pin. I was pretty sure that was the nicest present anyone had ever bought me.
***
I twirled around in front of the mirror. The fabric was so light and soft. There was a peephole in the front that showed off the perfect amount of cleavage to leave J.J. drooling. The dress crisscrossed at the neckline and the fabric crossed again in the back, leaving most of the back exposed. It was really sexy. Kristen even introduced me to sticky boobs. Which were basically exactly what they sounded like. A bra that just kinda sticks to your chest with tons of adhesive. They were a Godsend and I didn’t know how I had lived without one for so long. Especially since my breasts had never looked better.
Kristen whistled. “You look freaking hot.”
My smile was so big it practically hurt. “It’s not too much?”
“All this,” she waved her hands in front of me, “is perfecto. Tim Gunn would rave. Even Nina Garcia would give you two thumbs up.”
“I can’t imagine her doing that.”
“She would…just once for this ensemble. Swatch would bark in appreciation. The other contestants would swoon.”
“You really know how to build up my confidence.”
She smiled. “And speaking of moving…did you call your dad?”
Kristen was great at a lot of things, but no one was worse at segues than her. I laughed. “I did.”
“And?”
“He doesn’t care where I go.” He doesn’t care about me. Thinking about him slashed that ego boost she had just given me. It was hard to think you were amazing when someone treated you like a literal pile of shit.
“Well…that’s great! Seriously, I can’t imagine going to the University of New Castle without you now.”
I knew what she meant. Just thinking about not going gave me a pit in my stomach.
“So are you going to tell J.J. you applied tonight? The cherry on top of your amazing date?”