Page 89 of Missing Pieces (Men of Manhattan 3)

"Tyler..."

"My father died instantly. My grandfather died in surgery. And I walked away with a scratch."

She put her hand on the center of my chest. "It was an accident."

"He trusted me. He trusted me to get him home safe and I..." I balled my hand into a fist and put it up to my mouth. I couldn't remember the last time I cried. I hurt all the time. But it was a constant struggle to not give into my grief. I knew if I gave in, I would drown in it again.

"Tyler." She put her hand on the side of my face again but I shook it off.

"My dad and grandfather died because I didn't want to miss an exam. Who the fuck cares about a stupid exam? And when I think about it, I can't breathe. Because I feel like it should have been me. I should have been the one that died. It should have been me, Hails."

She sat up, straddled me on the bed, and threw her arms around me. "My heart is broken for you," she whispered against my neck.

And somehow that was so much better than an "I'm sorry" or an "it's okay." It was like she could feel my pain. And that her heart was breaking into a million pieces just like mine. "I failed them." I let myself give into my grief because I knew she was there to hold on to. I knew that I wouldn't drown as long as she was in my arms.

"You didn't fail them." She tightened her grip around me. "It was an accident. It could've happened to anyone."

"But it happened to me. And I don't know how to move past it." I could feel my tears making her hair wet. I squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as I could. "I'm broken, Hails. What are you doing with me?"

"You're the missing piece to my puzzle." She wiped the tears away from underneath my eyes. "And I love you."

I wanted to believe her. But we barely knew each other. I was rash. I clung to her because I needed to. She didn't need to cling to me. She was whole. She was perfect.

"I love the sound of your laugh." She kissed the side of my mouth. "And the feeling of your skin on mine." She kissed the side of my neck. "The goodness of your heart." She kissed the left side of my chest. "I love the way you look at me when you think I'm saying something insane." She smiled as she kissed the tip of my nose. "You're so strong, but you don't need to do everything alone. You have me."

"Hailey..."

"And I even love how hard you are on yourself, even though I don't understand why. But it's part of what makes you you. And I love the person that you are. I love you. All of you."

I grabbed the back of her neck and brought her lips down to mine. And I made love to her again. I made love to her like it was the last time I'd ever see her. Because I feared that it would be. Despite what she thought, there was probably a puzzle piece that fit her a lot better than I did. Someone full of life and energy and optimism. Someone worthy of her. Because Hailey Shaw was perfect. Way too perfect for me.

***

It took all my strength not to look back at her. If I did, I wouldn't be able to walk out the door. I placed the envelope down on the dresser and walked out into the hallway, closing the door as quietly as I could.

The decision was in her hands. I wasn't good enough for her. She deserved so much more than I could give her. But I still hoped she'd choose me. Because I was selfish. I wanted the world even though I deserved none of it.

I exhaled loudly as I walked out the front door of the motel. The seagulls called in the early morning. The sun was just rising over the mountains in the distance.

I stole a glance at the window that I knew Hailey was sleeping behind. And then I drove away. Leaving my heart behind in a crappy motel in Santa Monica. A motel room that in my head was even grander than a room at the Bellagio.

Chapter 47

Hailey

Friday

I reached out expecting to find Tyler, but I only felt empty sheets. I slowly opened my eyes. "Tyler?" I sat up and looked around the room. He wasn't there. He was gone.

I had a sinking feeling in my stomach as I threw the sheets off of me. He left without saying goodbye? No. I quickly pulled on a tank top and shorts. He couldn't leave without saying goodbye. I needed to tell him that I loved him again. I needed him to know that I truly meant it. That I'd wait for him. That I wouldn't hurt him.

Before I grabbed the doorknob of the hotel room, I noticed an envelope with my name on it on the dresser.

I quickly tore it open. There was a plane ticket back to Indiana, a picture, and a note. I swallowed hard. He left without saying goodbye. Why would he do that? I sat down on the edge of the bed and looked down at the picture. It was of us in front of the Santa Monica Route 66 sign. He looked so happy. The sun was setting in the picture, casting a glow around us. It made the picture look like it was from an old scrap book that my dad had from when I was a

baby. I wasn't sure how something could look so faded yet vibrant at the same time. I stared down at Tyler's handsome features. Why did it already feel like he was so far away? I slid the photo of Tyler into my pocket. Maybe that would make him feel closer.

I slowly unfolded the letter. Part of me didn't want to read it. I had this awful feeling that yesterday had been a lie. That he pitied me. That maybe he would be telling me the truth in this letter. I took a deep breath and stared down at the words.

---