Page 108 of Missing Pieces (Men of Manhattan 3)

"You abandoned me. You went to New York to be with your ex instead of me. I needed you, Tyler. I needed you and you weren't there."

"I didn't choose to go to New York."

"Great. I don't really care. Because I realized that I don't need anyone. I'm just fine on my own." She seemed to wince at her own words.

"Hailey..."

"And you know the worst part? My dad was always there for me, and I wasn't there for him when he needed me the most." She walked around the desk and shoved me hard in the chest. "Because I lost sight of what was important in my life." She shoved me again and I stepped backwards into the hall. "I'm never going to do that again." She shoved me even harder.

The bar had suddenly grown quiet. I could feel everyone's eyes on us. All I could focus on was that even when she was mad at me, I still felt the spark of her touch. But I didn't know what to say. Because deep down I knew I had already lost her. "I love you." I meant it as a declaration, but it came out as more of a plea.

"I'm done giving people second chances." She threw all the letters she had written to me at my face and slammed the door.

Chapter 59

Hailey

Saturday

My back slid down the door until my butt hit the floor. I hugged my knees to my chest and let myself cry.

I wanted to be able to hear him out and forgive him. But I couldn't even stand to look at him. He put me through hell. Never in a million years would I have thought he was in New York. He said he hated New York. He said he had moved on from Penny. He had told me he loved me. But nothing he said was true.

He looked thin. Had he been struggling through something too? Was he in as much pain as me? I shouldn't care. He was an asshole. So why the hell did I care?

I put my forehead on my knees. I wanted to throw my arms around him. I wanted to breathe in his scent. I wanted to feel his arms around me. I shook my head. I guess the only thing I actually wanted was for him to be the man I thought he was.

And the worst part was, I would never move on from him. Because that one week we had was the best of my life too. I loved him so much that it made my chest ache. I loved him, but I couldn't be in love with him.

I placed my hand on my stomach. But it wasn't really about us. No matter what, this baby deserved to know his father. I could put aside my own pain for that. Couldn't I?

Yes, Tyler and I were both a mess. Somehow our lives were a little less messy when we were together, though. That's how I knew this baby was going to be so good. He'd be the best of both of us. I wiped away my tears as a slowly stood up. We were complicated. But I would not put my own problems in front of my child's. He would always come first.

That's what gave me the strength to open the door and go after him. But he wasn't in the bar and his car wasn't outside.

"Did you see a guy in his mid twenties with shaggy blonde hair, Anna?"

"Yes, he left you this." She shrugged as she handed me a few napkins. There were words written hastily on both sides of three napkins. It almost felt like I was in a trance as I walked back to my dad's office. I closed the door with my foot and sat down at the desk as I started to read what Tyler had left.

Hailey,

I know that you probably won't believe me, but I needed you to know the truth. When I showed up at the San Diego Recruit Depot, they immediately detained me. They threw out my file and un-enlisted me because the case of James' shooting was still open. That's why there was no record of me when you called. They arrested me and sent me back to New York. I didn't choose to go. They held me in a cell until yesterday morning. I thought of you the whole time. I was worried that you might be sending me letters. I was worried that not hearing back from me would hurt you. I swear I never meant to cause you pain.

When they released me, all I wanted to do was come see you. I had to go back to my apartment to grab some cash because my car is still in San Diego and I had given you my credit cards and everything in my bank account. When I got to my apartment, Penny was there helping Melissa pack. I didn't seek her out. And I want you to know that I felt nothing. All I was focused on was how much I missed you. I didn't stay. I left as soon as I could to come to you. I don't know how to explain it, but it felt like you needed me. And I needed you.

I understand why you're upset. I'd be upset with me too. But I need you to know that the week we had together was real for me. My feelings were real. I do love you. And that's why I'm respecting your wishes. You won't see me again. But I just needed you to know the truth.

I'm so sorry about your dad. It breaks my heart that you lost him. I just hope you got a chance to say goodbye. If I kept you away from him for that, I'll never forgive myself. I can't say that I'm sorry enough. But I know you'll save the bar. I know you'll find someone better to share your life with. You deserve the world. Don't ever settle for less.

Thank you for giving me that week. Thank you for helping me feel whole again. I'll never forget you.

-Tyler

It's what I wanted. So why did I feel abandoned all over again? There was no phone number. There was no address. That was the only chance I'd get to tell him about the baby. I closed my eyes. To tell him how I really felt. I shook my head and opened my eyes again. I could add it to everything else I regretted.

I switched the computer back on and stared at the website I was trying to make. That was what I needed to focus on. This bar was my future. It always had been. I always wanted it to be. But I wasn't excited about it anymore.

Chapter 60

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