Page 62 of Sins (The Sins Trilogy 1)
No!I take two large steps, rip the phone from Harry’s hand. “Edgar.”
“Tony. I’m so sor—”
“Was there any jewelry? A necklace or anything like that?”
“Tony, the ID was posi—”
“Was there any jewelry?”
“Hold on.” There’s a pause while Edgar confers with someone. “They found a pendant in the car. Some kind of astrological motif…”
The rest of his words don’t register. A light-year away, I feel Harry’s hand on my shoulder.
It’s all fucking lie. A mistake. It has to be. Some messed-up prank. Ivy’s still mad, so she’s doing this to fuck with me. That’s fine. I deserve it.
Right? It’s just a prank. Her car in a bayou… It doesn’t mean anything…
But I know. Deep in my withered, fucked-up heart…I know the truth.
I should’ve never been such a coward, too afraid to let her in, to let her see all of me. If not, she wouldn’t have been in Tempérane over the weekend and she wouldn’t have had the accident. She would’ve known the depth of my feelings for her, that I love her more than anything in the world—more than my ego, more than my pride…more than anything—and how that feeling short-circuited my thoughts, flinging me from absolute bliss into an abject fear that she would know everything and cast me aside the way Mother did.
My knees hit the floor as my stomach heaves. The skin around my eyes grows hot, but no tears stream down my cheeks. They’re gathering and swelling in my heart instead, growing heavier and eating away my insides like acid, drop by drop.
This is all a lie. A lie. But even as I repeat it to myself …I know. And despair. And rage. And grieve. And loathe myself.
I never realized how dark and cold a Louisiana summer day could be.
The sun no longer rises, the moon no longer shines and there aren’t any stars to put a spark of happiness in my heart.
