Page 80 of Sins (The Sins Trilogy 1)
Jesus.I’m either going mad or this really is Ivy.
You have enemies who would love to break you, Tony, Edgar’s voice of reason says in my head.
“I’m okay now,” she whispers.
“How can you be all right?” I almost snarl, furious she’s trying to brush it off like nothing when I’m still burning with rage.
“Let go.” This time, she’s firmer, her muscles tensing as though she’s getting ready to fight.
I pull away, realizing she needs to have some control of the situation, and me snarling at her isn’t helping. She’s shaking.
Then she finally realizes a third of her bodice is drooping forward from the broken strap. She curses under her breath and holds it up, one arm crossed over her chest like a shield, her gaze alive with an animal wariness.
The look in her eyes puts shards of pain into my heart because it proves Edgar’s right. She isn’t Ivy, no matter what my heart wants to believe. Ivy wouldn’t have stared at me this way. She would’ve let me hold her, comfort her, take care of her. She would’ve let me shield her because she knew I’d protect her, no matter how badly I screwed up everything else.
I shrug out of my jacket and put it over her, pulling the lapels together. Then, very deliberately, I imagine myself getting a hold on my emotions, pushing them into a box and putting a lid on it. Because right now, Iris needs to be looked after. I can deal with my own feelings later.
* * *
Iris
The jacket’s warm from his body. His scent envelops me, and the fine hair at the back of my neck rises, my skin prickling. I clutch the lapels tightly, pulling them closer. I’m thankful for the cover the jacket gives me and touched by the protective gesture.
The man is a mystery—a total contradiction. When I ran into him at Hammers and Strings, I thought he was a gentleman—he caught me so I didn’t fall, then used a handkerchief to try to dry my tears when I cried. Tonight, he’s an absolute savage.
The ruthlessness with which he dealt with Jamie Thornton was terrifying, but I’d be lying if I said some part of me wasn’t grateful. He did it for me—to keep me safe.
But don’t you think it was too extreme? You ran into each other at the music store, but you’re basically strangers…
It was extreme…almost personal. Did something like this happen to someone close to him? Or maybe he and Jamie Thornton have a history.
His face is like granite, hard and unyielding. A sliver of apprehension ripples over my mind. Not a fear of him, per se. But of what could happen if I let myself get too close to him. He’s the kind of man a woman could easily get attached to…without ever being let into his heart. I’m not in L.A. for that kind of complication and emotional upheaval. I’m here to regain my memory. And to see if I can have a normal, fulfilling life just like everyone else.
Suddenly I feel drained and exhausted.
“Thanks for your help. I should…” Actually, I have no idea what I’m going to do next. There’s no way I can play the piano or drive home in this condition. Seeing Sam may not be the best—
“Do you want me to get you someone? A friend, maybe?”
I think for a moment, but can’t come up with a single person for him to call. I don’t have any family left, and Julie and Byron are both out of town. “It’s all right,” I say. “Nobody’s available.”
I suddenly realize even though Sam’s right here in this building, he isn’t on the list of people I think of when I need unconditional love, acceptance and comfort. That makes me feel infinitely alone and vulnerable. If only my parents were alive…
“I just want to leave now.” I meant to say it firmly. Instead, my voice breaks a little. I swallow, then shoot him an “everything’s fine” smile. He’s done enough. He doesn’t need me to break down and unload a bunch of messy emotions on him.
The muscles in his jaw flex as he regards me. Then something inside him shifts, pieces coming together to form a tight, cohesive whole. His eyes gleam with an unshakable resolve, which makes me apprehensive for some reason.
“Tony,” he says, his tone decisive. “My name is Tony. And I’m taking you home.”
