Page 110 of Secrets (The Sins Trilogy 2)
I look away. “Nothing. It’s not him. It’s me.”
“Horseshit! That’s what women always say when they’re mad but too bitchy to say why.”
Is this what Tony thought? But I’ve never said I was upset with him. Why is he assuming he did something wrong? “I’m not angry with him.”
“Then why are you torturing him? The only crime he committed is loving you too much. And the sad fucking fact is, you don’t deserve it because you don’t value it. Audrey Duff deserves him more. At least that bitch wants him badly enough to fight.”
Excruciating pain explodes in my heart. TJ might as well have trampled me.
“He isn’t eating. He doesn’t sleep,” TJ continues relentlessly. “The only reason he goes to work is all the employees and their families depend on him to put food on the table. Otherwise, he’d hole up in his room and never come out.”
Aching regret pours through me. I never wanted that for Tony. He shouldn’t suffer because of me. He doesn’t deserve this. I don’t deserve him.
“He was an SOB before he met you, but that’s better than what he is now. If you aren’t strong and brave enough to accept his love and love him back, then let—him—go.” TJ leans closer until our noses almost touch. “Or I’ll do it for you.”
His eyes are feral. This is a promise. He leaves quietly, not bothering to slam the door.
I should be scared, but I’m not. Only the most crippling pain and self-loathing are slicing through me. My mind conjures an image of Tony, hurting—not eating or sleeping. He’s so full of vitality and vigor that it’s impossible to imagine him that way, but TJ was telling the truth.
Audrey Duff deserves him more.
That crazy, self-centered bitch does not deserve Tony! She’d make him miserable.
But I’m doing the same thing to him, aren’t I?At least if she left him, he wouldn’t care that much. With me…
I look down at my hands. My fingers shake. Tony loves them, even though they’re weirdly long and sort of ugly. He loves everything about me, doesn’t care about my partial amnesia or my horrible uncle or cousin. Nothing matters to him as long as I’m with him.
“You okay?”
I raise my head and see Bobbi at the doorway. Her eyes are flinty. If I tell her no, she’s going to go find her cousin and try to beat the crap out of him. “I’m okay.”
“TJ didn’t do anything? Hurt you, or…?”
“He didn’t touch me. Just wanted to talk.” I give her a reassuring smile. But I don’t tell her I would’ve preferred that he punch me instead.
