Page 5 of Secrets (The Sins Trilogy 2)
“Iris. Iris!” A tight embrace.
My God. The straitjacket. It’s so tight around me that I can’t breathe. I thrash, using every ounce of strength in a last-ditch effort to free myself. If I struggle hard enough, maybe it’ll vanish, like the paw. “No, no!”
But the embrace doesn’t loosen. “Iris, it’s okay. I’ll keep you safe. I promise. I won’t let anything happen to you. I swear it.” Soothing kisses rain on the crown of my head, my forehead, cheeks and eyes. “You’re safe. I swear you’re safe.”
The voice is low. Anguished. A warm, large hand runs along my back in comfort. More words come, nonsense words said in a soft voice to calm.
Slowly, the panic ebbs away. As my breathing slows, my surroundings begin to make sense. I realize it’s Tony holding me, not a straitjacket. I’m not in a mental institute, about to be locked up. I’m home. In our bed.
Sudden relief crashes into me, and I collapse in his arms like a marionette with its strings cut. I clench my teeth, but the tears flow freely now. I can’t stop sobbing as the terror of the nightmare lingers, its macabre fingers still trailing over my mind.
“You’re safe, Iris. You’re safe,” he whispers again. “I swear, I won’t let anything happen to you. I will always keep you safe.”
I look into his tormented eyes and know he’s speaking the truth.
I clutch him tightly and press my face to his strong chest. Smell the mix of his warm male scent and chlorine, which brings back the pool at Sam’s mansion and the nightmare I just had. I shiver, then finally register that his clothes are damp. I look up at him.
“You’re wet.” He’s in the same clothes he wore at Sam’s…when he pulled me out of the water. My memory’s a bit hazy after Sam pushed me into the pool, but I remember Tony leaning over me, saying something I didn’t quite understand over the thrumming of my heart.
“I know. I was too late. I didn’t get there until Sam pushed you into the pool.”
I remember Sam’s eyes flaring with grim apprehension before he decided to push me back in, knowing I can’t swim. If Tony hadn’t been there… I shiver, refusing to let my mind go in that direction. “No. You got there in time. You saved me.”
The self-loathing in his gaze says he doesn’t accept my version of events. “If you hadn’t passed out, I would’ve killed Sam for what he did. How long did he torture you?”
Does he know about the threat Sam made to declare me incompetent? Or is this something else?
What the Tony from my nightmare did flashes through my mind. I turn away. The expression of disgust and pity—I don’t want to see that on his face, ever.
Suddenly, I’m afraid to tell him everything, even as I’m desperate to have someone believe I’m not crazy or incompetent. What if he agrees—even a little bit—with Sam? That maybe I don’t really know what’s good for me?
It was just a dream. Tony didn’t really do it. Don’t push him away because of your nightmare.
I search his face. Even knowing about my messed-up memory, he’s never once judged me or treated me like I was weird or pathetic. He’s rescued me twice already—from Jamie Thornton and now Sam. He deserves my complete trust.
I take a breath. “It started the day he tried to ship me off to Tokyo. He said he’d find a judge who’d declare me incompetent. It wouldn’t be that hard because I’m not…normal like most people. My memories are…patchy. Then he could do whatever he wanted with me. My opinion wouldn’t matter at all.”
Cursing under his breath, he cradles my face in his large hands. “Nobody’s going to do anything to you. I won’t let anybody take you away. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you today. I had no idea Sam would do that.”
“That’s right. You didn’t know. So don’t blame yourself.” I don’t know what it takes to declare somebody incompetent, but if Tony says he won’t let Sam do it to me, I trust he won’t. He’ll find a way somehow.
“But I should’ve anticipated. It wouldn’t have been like him to give up.”
Ah, Tony.His self-castigation is just too painful. It’s like he can’t give himself credit even after winning the battle. I pull back a bit to look at his beloved face, running a hand over his jaw. “I didn’t realize how far he’d go. None of us are bad guys for that. Sam’s the villain here.” I press a kiss on his cheek. “You mind if I use the bathroom?”
He gestures at the en suite bathroom. “Take your time.”
“You should change,” I say, suddenly realizing I’m in a new set of clothes, but he isn’t. “I don’t want you to get sick.” He starts to get that mulish look. “Please?”
“All right.”
I close the door to the bathroom and go to the sink. The mirror above it shows a pale young woman with a blotchy, tear-streaked face. I splash some cold water on it. I’m grateful Tony showed up when he did. When Sam pushed me into the pool…
I close my eyes, gripping the edge of the sink with trembling hands. You’d think falling in a second time would be less shocking, but it was actually worse. The first time was an accident. The second wasn’t. Sam knew exactly what he was doing. And from the hard glint in his eyes as I plunged back in, I could tell he wasn’t going to pull me out again. It’s scary how water can bury you. No matter how I moved my arms and legs, I couldn’t propel myself toward the surface. Actually, the harder I tried to swim, the faster I seemed to sink.
Why did he try to kill me? Was it because he realized he could get rid of me permanently? Given how hard he tried to make me leave, my being in Los Angeles is a problem for him somehow. But enough for murder?
Think Tony’s still going to want you if he knows what a crazy needy girl you are?Sam’s voice asks.
I shudder, blinking. Tony still loves me. I can tell from his voice, the way he holds me. It’s like I’m the most precious thing in the world.
But still… I can’t stop the humiliation from lapping at me anyway. Tony’s so dynamic, so wonderful that I feel like one day he’s going to wake up, take a look at me and wonder what the hell he’s doing with such a broken mess.
