Page 491 of One More Kiss

Julian

Six years have comeand gone and I still lose my self-control when it comes to Olivia. It’s not like I haven’t seen her around town or at the mall or at town events. She’s as heavenly as ever. Blonde hair, blue eyes, five-foot-five of sweet goodness. Her body is a wonderland of everything I love. Weighty, perky tits that fit just right in the palms of my hands, an ass as ripe as a peach that I could never stop myself from smacking, and a body with wide hips that are perfectly wrapped up in sin so divine that I am willing to sell my soul to the devil himself.

I noticed today however she was lookin’ a bit slimmer. She’s been running the track at our old high school for the past two months as I see her when I’m mowing the football field as one of many odd jobs I take on. I never pegged her as a runner, but she made good on running away from us. From me. I know a lot carried over after Lucas died. I watched as the lights shut off in her eyes that night. The call came in around eleven p.m., we were caught up in bed, sharing one more kiss goodnight like always when her phone rang. She wasn’t going to answer it but I made her.

The world stopped spinning that night and same for the days that followed. Her parents were going through a bitter divorce at the time so the funeral was a complete shitshow. It didn’t help that her old man brought his new shiny girlfriend. I tried to comfort Olivia the best I could without raising any flags that we were together. She was eighteen and I was twenty-four, plus I was her brother’s best friend and fellow Army brother so it definitely wasn’t the time or place to announce our budding relationship. But I was there for whatever Olivia needed in that time. I made sure she ate, stayed hydrated, even got her to nap with me at my place. To put it mildly, she was a living, breathing zombie trapped in a constant daze. I never seen a brother and sister closer than Olivia and Lucas. Although he was older and always had his dad-cap on when she was out with us or out with her school friends, I watched how he adored his baby sister. He fulfilled his big brother role in so many ways so of course I was angry when I realized he had so much left to fulfill in this life and he would now never get the chance to now.

I was bitter over his choice for a while. I didn’tor mostly didn’t want to understand why. Why did he kill himself? Why didn’t he come to me for help? How didn’t I realize he was suffering? The list of questions I would never get answers to went on and on for days and weeks. He seemed fine the last time I saw him. We were spending time together in his parent’s basement watching the Vols play Georgia while shooting the breeze about our future in the Army. Lucas was deployed and in Afghanistan for some time before I showed up. He had already experienced heavy fire and mass casualties and I knew it affected him. It’s rough being out there. You’re away from your home and your family and your friends and you’re expected to be brave when in the moment of hailing bullets and wounded peers, you just want to click your heels and go home like that stupid movie Olivia likes quotes. But we signed up to defend and honor our homeland. It’s a steep price, and it only gets steeper when you come home and are thrown back in with society because the list at the VA for therapeutic care is as long as your arm.

But Lucas wasn’t fine. My assumption was off and I kick myself for not asking more questions. For not knowing my best friend better than I already thought I did.

I roll up into the cemetery and park behind a familiar silver Toyota. I kill the engine and grab the six pack of beer off the passenger seat before hopping out of my truck. From my view, I see a dainty blonde sitting on an orange and white plaid blanket on the sloped hillside. There’s a couple of newcomers when I make my way across the lawn and towards that familiar backside whom is gazing at the black granite headstone reading, LUCAS WILLIAM HAWTHORNE, alongside his Army rank, and beloved son and brother quoted at the bottom.

“No books to reshelve today?”

Olivia looks over her shoulder and gives me a small smile. “I took the day off. My body needed it.” I open my mouth but Olivia stops me. “And don’t make a crude comment about what my body needs!”

I laugh and park myself in the empty space beside her. I pull a can of beer from the plastic ring and place it down in front of Lucas’ headstone. I pull another for myself, and one for Olivia.

“It’s ten in the morning,” she whines.

I crack open my can and take a long sip. “It’s never too early for beer, especially on a birthday.” That’s right, today would have been Lucas’ 31st birthday. He left us a day before what would have been his twenty-fifth birthday. We have to grieve twice in one sitting. Once to mourn the day he departed, and the other to cherish the day he arrived and left pieces of himself in our lives forever.

“Do you think he misses us?” Olivia questions, her voice a bit broken.

I let out a heavy sigh. “I would like to believe so, but then again you were a huge pain in the ass growing up so, no, I bet he’s relieved to get a break from you.”

Olivia punches me in the arm. “I was not!” she whines again. “If anything, you and Lucas were probably on the sheriff’s radar the whole time. More so you than Lucas.”

“I’ve never denied that I was a bad boy. You know me better than anyone else.”

And that’s a fact. There were a few girls before Olivia but none that I ever gave the key to all my locks too. Although she was young and impressionable, Olivia amazed me with how grown she actually was. I do believe Lucas had a helping hand in molding her to be older than her age but nonetheless we spent countless hours talking and breaking down barriers between us. We became friends before we became lovers. I think that’s why after some time apart we still remained on good terms because we stayed good friends.

Although I’m still very much in love with her.

“What are your plans today?” I ask her.

Her long blonde hair whips with the breeze as she turns and lays those heavenly blue sky eyes on me. “Mom and Dad decided to take a cruise around the Caribbean so there’s no celebratory birthday dinner and cake I’m forced to attend and watch the two of them mope than argue over. I might go home and binge watch that new serial killer documentary and eat my cookie dough ice cream.”

“Or you can join me for dinner at my place.”

Olivia lolls her head to the side like she’s half expecting me to add something dirty towards my offering.

“No cake or candles or pinatas,” I assure her. “Just some wholesome food on the barbeque and all the finest cheap beer you can drink.”

She turns back to Lucas’ headstone and says, “What do you think Lucas? Do I trust a man sporting a Georgia Bulldogs ballcap?”

“Now wait a minute,” I holler. “My grandfather was a Georgia man. You know I’m all-day, every day Tennessee. And don’t forget who went to Oklahoma here.”

Her warm laugh smacks my heart out of rhythm as it’s been awhile since I saw that beautiful smile cross her lips.

“Okay fine,” she falters. “But I’m warning youthere better be dessert or you’re going to be joining Lucas in the afterlife!”

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