Page 2 of Life is Guarded

“1 and 2 and 3 and 4…”

“Hudson, move,” my dad stated. The lifeguards gathered around with bags of equipment as one of the men began to continue mouth to mouth. “I said…”

I slithered backwards, my feet pushed the sand into mounds until my back hit a rock, and watched the scene unfold before my eyes. The jagged edge of the rock hit against my skin, but it didn’t faze me in the slightest as my gaze remained glued in front of me. The lifeguards and my dad worked on the child who I learned was called Paul from the teenagers who’d ran over. They were his cousins who should’ve been watching him, but instead they’d been playing pranks and had forgotten about him. I was gobsmacked. My estimate on his age was bang on, six years old and as the shock took hold, I covered the front of my chest and winced in pain as the tightness of a cage overcame my heart, locking it in tight. I couldn’t take anymore. I tried to remain calm, but this surge of panic was overwhelming as I released my hand from my chest and just stared at the little child. He was so small. My hands covered my face, and I prayed. I prayed it wasn’t too late. That I’d done enough and that the doubts that ricocheted through my head would expel into darkness. That my conscience was clear, and I’d done enough to save a family heartache. Maybe if I’d been a few moments quicker? Maybe if I’d not left his side? I felt peace the moment I heard his spluttering and coughing fill the air, and my fears calmed enough for the rhythm of my heart to begin to return to a normal pace.

He was alright. He was alive.

The lifeguards loaded Paul onto a stretcher and carried him across the length of sand to be met by the boy’s aunt and the EMT’s began to transfer him into the ambulance to take him to hospital. At least one of the teenagers had thought with their heads at that moment and reached out. Hopefully, little Paul’s mother was on her way too. He was lucky. Not so many are, but as we all knew, the next few days were critical. I knew time was of the essence and my approach of no hesitation may have determined those precious moments of giving him the best chance going forward.

It made me think about one thing: my future. I learned quickly that the incident with Paul had been a rare anomaly on this beach and that cases of needing a lifeguard to intervene were far and few between. The area was notorious for being calm and uneventful, but that day it wasn’t and that fateful day an exception to the rule happened. It showed me how sacred life was and nothing was completely foolproof. Incidents would happen, no matter how well trained you are or how unlikely a wave was to hit. Some things were unpredictable. Life certainly didn’t always follow the projection we wanted it to.

I was going to follow in my father’s footsteps and never have that helpless feeling crushing inside my body again. With the right training, I could be prepared to cope with any eventuality with which I was tasked. I was going to train to become a lifeguard and make not only him proud but myself too.

CHAPTERONE

SUMMER

5 years later

Iknew when Mom and I moved to Puako, it would be different. My mother described it as a place that hopefully would complete us again, words at first that confused me. I didn’t realize that nothing would compare to what I would learn about the area and the emotions it brought with it.

It was a complete change from Honolulu, and where I’d been brought up. For one, the size of the place but also its atmosphere. Honolulu was vibrant and busy people wanted to be seen and heard, but here in Puako it was a quieter life. Everyone knew each other, but it made for building bridges rather than gossip central. A small population with a close-knit community. I was glad about it though. Honolulu had everything a teenager like me wanted, except for one thing: my brother. It held painful memories for both my Mom and I, and finally the time felt right to make the move away. A time to leave the cosmopolitan capital city with its historical beauty and stunning landmarks and start afresh with Puako’s long shorelines and peaceful haven. The realtor told me to expect a lack of contact from people within the area, with it having such a small population, but that didn’t bother me. The kids had formed small groups when we visited, and I felt unwelcome. I didn’t mind. I liked being alone. I wasn’t a person that sought out others automatically, but I was nineteen and a new girl in the area. Would I now be gossip central with everyone wanting a piece of the new girl?

Except the local girls were having none of me being a loner, and neither were their parents. Girls were meant to be in groups and have fun they said, not sulk in their room. Had I really given off a moody teenager vibe already? They made their presence known from the moment the removal van had pulled away after unloading our belongings in our new sand yellow cladded beach house near Beach 69. They brought welcome baskets ladened with fresh foods and the area’s famous spicy clam dip. It was as if we’d always been here. A part of the small community. A new family. Never an outcast or to be secluded.

“Summer, why don’t you head out and explore the area? Maybe go with Natalia and Raquel’s girls?” Mom asked, as she leant over the kitchen island and reached for a bottle of Koloa Rum out of the welcome basket that had been delivered, and started to rummage through a box. “A-ha! Found the glasses. Would you fancy a drink with me, ladies?”

“Of course,” Natalia said, “it’d be rude not to.”

“Go on girls, why not head off down to Puako Beach Drive? It’s a beautiful day. I’m sure Summer could attempt to find a bikini or if she can’t find one in the midst of the crazy number of boxes, one of you two girls could help her out. I’m sure you’d be a similar size,” she uttered as she eyed me up and down and smiled before nodding at the girls.

I couldn’t help but notice the visible shudder pass over my mother’s body and the tick of her jaw at the mention of the beach, but I didn’t question it. I knew the area held a tainted past for her, but she wanted the opportunity to push past that and live a life where she could finally be free from the pain.

She’d never admitted to me what pain she’d suffered here or her reasons of hurt related to Puako, and I wasn’t one to pry. If I’m honest, I’d always thought it had something to do with my dad. Maybe it was a place they met on a date? The reminder was still painful of him leaving us both to have our own lives rather than fight, saying he couldn’t live with himself anymore. Depression was an ugly disease, especially when it affected a loved one. He’d call once in a blue moon to check in, but that was all the communication we got. We’d be left with a three-minute period of sobs down the line so he could hear our voices. I wished we could’ve done more, but until he wanted our help, there was nothing we could do except hope that my aunt and uncle guided him in the right direction.

The moment Mom was ready to talk about what had caused her reaction, I’d be here for her. I couldn’t risk losing her, too.

I knew, though, in reality, the moms just wanted to gossip and enjoy that rum. It didn’t matter my age or the fact I could easily look after myself. I respected my mom and her decisions, especially after what we’d pulled ourselves through the last few years. The troubled times had certainly outweighed the good, but we’d stood strong—together.

“Looks like we haven’t a choice,” I said with a grimace. “It seems we’re not wanted here. Amelia, Jess, give me five and I’ll see what I can put together.”

“It’s not like that… it’s just…” Mom shouted after me, but I ignored her as I quickly walked through the light airy house and stood for a moment underneath the air-con unit, grateful for the cool fresh breeze after I’d lugged all those boxes through the house in the heat.

I knew I should have been happy to get out, and I was, but I’d done my research. I knew where Puako Beach Drive led. It was pretty obvious and out of all the places we could’ve explored, it was the one I wanted to avoid. I mean, I loved the quiet. I loved the picturesque beauty that surrounded us here. I hated the fact though it was around the water, in particular the sea. I’d be fine as long as I remained on the white sandy shore and the safety of solid ground.

I took deep breaths and placed my hands on my knees as I tried to regulate my breathing to a steady, regular style. The fast pace would only send my body into a full-blown panic, and that wouldn’t be helpful for anyone. If anything, it’d make the situation worse. I’d learned through calm gentle exercises that if I took my time, it would pass, and the trigger would subside.

I knew I had to get my mind in check. The girls would start asking where I was. I headed down and made my way quietly toward them in the hope that they didn’t want to raise much of a conversation. I didn’t have the energy left to do so. The sun had started to cloud over in the sky, and I slowed my pace over the rockery, desperate for an announcement from someone to say that the beach wasn’t safe, or it was out of bounds, but it never came. The temptation to flee was high as the sweat started to pour from my skin and the dryness in my mouth increased as the girls’ shouts from ahead drowned straight through my ears without a chance to process them.

I was lost in my own mind, stuck in a place that I was desperate to escape from as my feet reached the soft dunes beneath me.

“You took your time.” Jess scowled as she crossed her arms before she flicked her hair over her shoulder. “Come on.”

“I… I was just admiring the view.” I let the lie slip quickly from my lips without hesitation as Amelia linked her arm to mine.

“It’s okay, ignore her, she’s just desperate to see the others and introduce you to some of our friends,” Amelia sniped back with a sharp glare poised at Jess. “Come on, Finn and Hudson should be waiting for us.”

I counted my steps as we made our descent down, the soft warm sand leaving our footprints behind us as we made our way further from the main stretch. My senses were overwrought as the smell of the water hit me and began suffocating me. I knew being near so many beaches and the water would be a challenge I’d have to overcome, but I never expected to be thrown in at the deep end. That’s how it felt to me; drowning and no way to reach the surface.

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