Page 55 of Finding Fate

I throw the shirt on the floor and get under the comforter too, but grab her waist and pull her back to the middle against my front. “I’m breaking all kinds of rules tonight. What’s one more. When you’re gone I’ll have to do a hard reset.”

“Me fucking too,” she adds, already sounding like she’s halfway to sleep. “Got a rep to protect.”

My curiosity just piqued.

Gabby

I walk by Presley’s office and stop just outside of the door when I hear talking. “I thought we could go shopping today and hang out before I have to leave for the airport tomorrow; maybe have lunch too,” Paxtyn says. “I don’t see you much anymore.”

“Uh, crap. Me and Sayler had a salon and spa day scheduled today. I’m trying to stay stress free for the baby so that I don’t . . .” She pauses. My guess is that for whatever reason she was about to talk about her abortion and decided against it. I know she’s told me a few times that she’s overly cautious hoping to avoid a possible miscarriage after what they’ve been through over her terminating their last pregnancy. I can’t even imagine being pregnant again after losing my son. I’d be a nervous wreck. “We scheduled it before you told me you were coming. Her hair girl books out months in advance. It was luck Gabby got in last minute from a cancellation, but Sayler is sort of a VIP client of hers, I think. I thought you’d sleep ‘til lunch and then we could maybe get dinner and see a movie or whatever you want to do.”

I feel terrible for eavesdropping. “Oh, okay. No biggie,” Paxtyn responds, the disappointment obvious. I’ve watched her try to spend time with Presley off and on since she got here on Friday, and somehow, she always gets ditched for something else that doesn’t seem as important to me. I think Paxtyn told me she’s even missing a day of school to be here for the entire weekend since she traveled on her day off from school.

I’m not sure if Presley is even aware she’s putting shit she can do later before her sister that came all the way from California to spend time with her, but it’s sad. Friday, she forgot to pick her up from the airport because she was meeting with an architect about designing the add on for the baby’s room. Yesterday she was nauseous and tired and just wanted to hang around here since the boys were practicing in the basement, but the second Sayler had the idea to run to the store she magically felt better. Now, today, she’s got appointments that she could have rescheduled the second she found out her sister was coming. Tomorrow she flies back home.

Presley is such a nice person, and she’s been nothing but kind and hospitable to me, but she’s being a shitty sister, which is crazy considering how much she dotes on the boys—all of them. She hasn’t even noticed that Paxtyn and Landon seem to always mysteriously disappear and resurface at the same times. Maybe I just pick up on it because Maddox and me used to sneak around, but it’s pretty obvious they’re sleeping together to me, which is fine. I mean, they’re both single and the girl is more than capable of making decisions for herself at seventeen. They’re both somewhat flushed every time they come back from missing status.

Friends will come and go, but family is forever. There have been many times I’ve wished I had siblings, because one day my dad is going to die and I’ll have no one left of blood relation that matters to me. I may not like him right now, but I love him. “Do you want to come with us?” Presley asks, making me shake my head. She should be at leastofferingto cancel. She’s going to regret it one day—sooner than later—when she’s a mother and family closeness matters to her and she wonders why her sister wants nothing to do with her.

“That’s okay. You already had this planned. I’ll find something to do and then we’ll get dinner tonight. Have fun.” Footsteps sound, getting closer with each one. I step back slowly, trying to be quiet. They stop again. “Oh, Presley . . . I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye, but congratulations on the baby. You’ve had a thing for K forever. I’m happy for you guys.”

My shoulders drop as I slowly inch away from the door, taking off in a sprint once I’m out of earshot. I swear I wonder if the Paxtyn I hung out with Friday night and the one Presley describes is the same person. Yeah, there’s the bitchiness around other people, and at first glance she seems awfully spoiled and bratty, but when you get her alone, she’s fun to hang out with and all that other stuff goes away. It reminds me of how I was with Maddox gone—acting out for an underlying reason.

I’ll hang out with her. What a shitty vacation to come all the way to Miami and sit in the house. I’m still exploring this big city myself, and me and Maddox were going to go to town anyway. I think he wanted to get some wings and beer and watch football on the big screen. I’ll see if he minds letting her come with us. He won’t—I hope.

Thirty-Two

Paxtyn

Irun down the basement stairs to change into something cute, trying not to cry. I will not cry in front of people. I never have and I never will. Being a bitch gives me an upper hand. People don’t think they can hurt you when you’re mean. When you act like you don’t care you’re invincible. If you act spoiled they think you’re shallow. Maybe coming here without my parents was a mistake. I knew she had another life now. I expected her to have friends. I didn’t expect for her to continuously blow me off, though, when I put forth so much effort to come see her. I put myself out there.

When Mom told me she was pregnantagainI knew I needed to try harder. I want to be close to my siblings. I want to be close to my nieces and nephews. My brother Preston makes an effort to hang out with me more than my own sister does, and he’s a guy who’s happily whoring around right now because of the whole Kinzleigh situation. He doesn’t even hide it. The ‘fantastic four’ isn’t so fantastic anymore. It seems a little bit like Karma to me for always leaving me out. Presley doesn’t think I know about the abortion, but what she also doesn’t know is that Mom and me have gotten closer since her and Preston aren’t around. It’s not perfect but it’s nice.

Mom told me everything. She said there was no point in keeping it a secret anymore. The Bakers knew about it, Dad knew about it, and it clearly wasn’t going to go away. She gave me her reasoning and took it as an opportunity to school me some more on safe sex. I wanted so badly to throw in her face that I’m the one that held onto my virginity the longest, but that’s not a very mature thing to do, so I listened and gave my opinion, which is that I understood in terms of being a parent, but Presley has also never hid her feelings for Konnor. She was pretty damn obvious about it over the years. Even I picked up on it. Given the person it involved, she should have just let it go. Had it been anyone else, it would have likely been the right call.

I want us to have a relationship. I want to be friends with my sister. I didn’t think it’d be this hard so late in the game. Oh well. Better luck next time. At least she’s letting me take her car and riding with Sayler so I’m not stuck in the house. No one comes to a place like Miami and stays inside. I can’t totally blame her, though. I’m sure she’d rather hang out with another pregnant girl than a non-pregnant one. That whole mutual likes and all.

“Hey.” I ignore the hot guy standing to my left by the stage with a guitar strapped to his chest as I walk right past him like I didn’t even notice he was there, even though I heard the music long before I got to the bottom of the staircase and heard his voice as he called out to me. He’s impossible to actually ignore. I knew from the second he opened that damn door Friday that I was going to have to be a mega bitch to not be obvious that I think he’s hot. Jeez. I don’t know how much that actually worked since I gave him my virginity within hours.

Out of all the guys at school that have taken me out to try to get in my pants or found me lingering around at parties and became my company for the evening, it never crossed my mind to actually sleep with any of them. Make out sessions, sure. A little innocent over the clothes groping here and there while kissing, yes. When you are walking around with size D perky boobs and a small waist guys are going to want to touch them. Sometimes it’s fun to have the power to tell them yes or no.

“Paxtyn,” he calls out as I walk into the bedroom space, headed for my suitcase, trying to ignore that southern accent that does things to areas south of my waistline. It’s such a foreign sound of slow, deep words I’ve never experienced, and I can’t figure out why in God’s name I like it, but one thing I will admit—to myself—is that I may understand what drew Kinzleigh to Breyson in the beginning. That slow talking of words with drawn out syllables tends to wrap around a girl and hold her brain hostage. California people don’t talk anything like him. I like to think we don’t have an accent at all.

As I dig through the contents looking for what I want to wear for the day, I’m jerked up by the arm. I blink long and hard to make sure my eyes don’t give off a glossy sheen, just in time for him to turn me around. “What?” I bite out, looking into his gray eyes. He’s so hot. Damn. “Can you not take a hint?”

Instead of getting angry, he smirks. What is wrong with this picture? He leads me toward the wall, already pulling my homecoming tee shirt up my body to remove it. When I’m pinned to it, he shoves my sleep shorts down my legs. “Did you wake up with a little extra bitchiness today?”

I keep my hands to myself, intrigued. “What do you want?”

He jerks his shirt off and unbuttons his jeans, shoving them down low. “I think it’s pretty obvious.”

I smother my smile. Ugh, he gets to me. “Who said my legs are open? You think you can just shove that big dick in me anytime you want to?”

He grabs my ass and lifts me up, pressing me against the wall. As I wrap my arms and legs around him for support, he positions himself just right and thrusts inside, drawing my eyes closed from how good it feels. Had I really known sex would feel like this after the initial break-in period, someone could’ve possibly persuaded me, but then again, maybe it’s just this scenario. I’m a blank canvas with him. He knows nothing about the girl I am back in California. “Hell yeah. You started this shit. I’m going to get my fill.” The way his words are choppy like he’s breathing deep between each one just makes it hotter.

“Yes,” I whisper, taking every thrust and wanting more. Every touch, every thrust, and every turn-on are like nothing I’ve ever experienced. For a half hour at a time, some of the times less and some more, it’s like I’m someone’s central focus. I don’t have to fight for attention. I don’t have to beg. I don’t have to be the shadow behind someone else. I’m not invisible. He wants me for me, and even if it’s just sexually, I feel like I’m more myself in the heated moments with him than I have in years.

He leans in and pushes my hair out of the way, before running his lips up the side of my neck, and then replaces his hand to the backside of my thigh, shoving it back toward the wall to spread me wider. With every penetration a panty breath gets knocked out of me. I lean my head to the side, giving him more space, and when I open my eyes they lock with Gabby’s, who is standing in front of Maddox in the open space that leads into the bedroom area, both of them with a certain smile present. My mouth falls open, a moan fighting to slip, and before any words come out, Maddox places his index finger over his mouth, making me smile, and then he places his hands on Gabby’s shoulders to pull her away.Come find me after,she mouths.

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