Page 27 of The Penalty Shot (Totally Pucked 5)

For a second, I feel like she might say no, until she swings her door open and steps aside for me to come in. She’s changed into a large t-shirt that hangs down to her thighs, and her hair is braided and pulled to one side.

This is the first time I’ve seen her room, and I glance around as I pull out the small bench on her vanity and take a seat. Everything is white with pops of pink. Sophisticated, yet cute as fuck. Just like she is. There are photos of Alex and her on every surface, and photos of her and two guys locked in a hug. A hint of jealousy flares inside of me, but I tamp it down. I have no right to be jealous, and I fucking know that.

“I’m sorr-”

“I’m sorry-”

We both speak at the same time, and she blushes, taking a seat on the bed. “You first.”

“I’m not sorry that I kissed you, but I am sorry that I did it before you were ready.”

I watch as her throat bobs, and she pulls her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. “I’m sorry that I…freaked out.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. Nothing.”

She averts her gaze, glancing down at the white comforter.

“Auden, I’m so fucking attracted to you, I can’t see straight.” Her eyes whip up to meet mine and they widen. “I have been since the day I met you. You’re beautiful, kind, funny. I’m sorry if that scares you, but I believe in being honest, and I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. I know…we just became roommates, and if that’s a problem, I can find another place to live, and I will still pay my part of the rent. I just want you to know that I don't want to stop…whatever this is.”

“Asher…” she whispers nervously, grabbing her hair and twisting it around her finger, “I-I’m attracted to you too, I just…I don't know how to do this. I’m not this girl. I’m not bold and confident and I don’t date, Asher. I work, and I take care of my son. That’sit.You’re a professional hockey player; you are so unbelievably hot, and you probably have so many women, models, actresses, all of them falling at your feet who are way better at dating and flirting…and other stuff…than me. I don’t think I can be the girl that you want.”

“What do you think I want?”

My question surprises her I think because her eyes shoot to mine and her brow furrows. Standing from the bench, I cross the room and sit directly in front of her. Her knees brush along my forearm as I lean in, tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear. “Youare what I want, Killer. I’m interested inyou.Just you. If you couldn’t tell by what happened in the pool, I’m attracted to you, and I want to explore where this goes. The ball is in your court. It happens at your pace, however slowly you want it to go.”

Pulling her lip between her teeth, she chews it anxiously. “I have to be honest about something.”

I nod, “Okay, tell me.”

“I’ve only…uh, had sex once, the night I lost my virginity. I was taught to believe that premarital sex was wrong, but a boy liked me and it was nice to have his attention, have him doting over me when my parents were so harsh and cold. I knew that I wasn’t ready, but we did it anyway. It was only once, never again. After that, he walked away from me and from Alex. Not only that, but my parents made me feel like the world’s biggest slut when I got pregnant, and then my life was no longer mine. I lived for Alex, and I have every single second since then. I just…I don't trust easily, and I’ve never been attracted to anyone or trusted them enough to give them that piece of me. I’ve spent the last eight years being a mother, and nothing else.” When she’s done speaking, she blows out a long, ragged breath, and I realize how much it took out of her to admit that. She swipes away a stray tear and looks up at me through watery lashes. “I felt like I should be honest and upfront with you.”

Holy fucking shit. Auden is practically avirgin.

I try not to think about that fact much right now, since she's only a few inches away and smells so damn good.

“Hey, look at me,” I use my fingers to tip her chin up, so her eyes meet mine, “I’m intoyou, Auden. I don’t care how inexperienced you are; it’syouthat I’m into. So, if you are into me, and want to explore this, then let’s do it. If you want to stop, we stop. You control this. But, if you are interested? I’m asking you to give me a chance. We can figure out the other stuff, but sex isn’t shameful. You shouldn’t feel ashamed for being interested in it, and you shouldn’t feel ashamed because you haven’t done things. That shit doesn’t matter to me.”

She nods. “I know. It’s just sometimes I forget that, after spending so long believing that it was. I-I want to try, to explore my attraction to you… but I’m not sure I’m ready for anything more than that. I don’t want Alex getting attached to someone. I work a lot, and Alex is always going to be my number one priority. He comes first, always, and I can’t jeopardize that. Especially for my own selfishness. Kissing you felt g-good…” She bites her lip, then releases it, “...all over…And I am curious, but this can’t be serious. There has to be boundaries because I can’t afford for this to end badly.”

“Listen, for now, let’s just explore. I’m busy too, and I don’t have time to dive into anything serious, but I am interested inyou,so let's not label things, let’s go with the flow. We just make a promise to each other that we don't let our arrangement affect anything else. We keep it casual, and based completely on your pleasure and comfort.”

A blush creeps up her neck and to her cheeks, staining them red. Fuck, I hope she agrees because I can’t wait to see her blush red while I’m worshipping her.

“O-okay. I think that could work.”

I can’t help the grin that tugs at my lips.Fuck yes.

“So…” I trail off, “I’m going to bed. I’m beat, and I think you could use the night to think about everything. See you in the morning?”

Auden nods, and I lean forward and press my lips against hers just briefly, before I stand and leave the room.

I don’t give her time to react or overthink it. I think that might be the key with Auden, helping her work through the shit in her head and to understand that she doesn’t have to be ashamed about her sexuality.

I know exactly where to start.

The next morning, I slept later than usual, since I spent most of the night tossing and turning, thinking about the thin wall that separated Auden and me. When I finally emerge from bed, sleep still heavy in my eyes and my brain foggy from exhaustion, I head straight for the coffee maker.

Auden emerges from her bedroom, wearing a sports bra and a pair of leggings that mold to her body and have my dick rising in my sweatpants.

---