Page 42 of The Ruthless Guardian

“It has to be unexpected. It won’t work if I’m not actually afraid.”

“Okay. I’ve got more work to do today, but I’ll be done soon.” His fingers slip under my jaw and turn me to face him so he can kiss my lips and release me from his hold. “You go relax.”

Chapter Thirty-two

Skids

Ihave never done something like this before, but I can tell it’s something she’s put thought into. It’s something so delicate that I need to be sure I’m in the right place to give this to her, because if I’m not I’m going to do more damage.

Kinks find their roots in trauma and grow out of the need for healing. Phoebe needs to surrender to me to find her power, and I’m okay with that. I’ll provide that for her the best way I can. She needs to see that she’s in control, that I’ll stop if she asks me to.

I’m not in love with the idea of making her afraid of me. I never want her to fear me or worry that I could hurt her for real, but I understand her desire to prove to herself that she is stronger than the painful memories of her past. She needs this, and I need to be the one to do it for her.

I can say the words that traumatized her and take the power away from them, stealing away their ability to continue to harm her. I need Phoebe whole and unafraid, and if I have to push both of our limits to get her there, then I will.

I just have to take a few minutes to remind myself that anything I do to her won’t be done with the intention to hurt her, but to help her. Phoebe will tell me if she’s too scared or needs me to stop, and I have to trust her to do that. I have to trust her to acknowledge her own feelings, which may actually be the scariest part. Phoebe doesn’t like to allow herself to feel things.

And I have to admit to myself that her desire for this isn’t far off from things I’ve considered myself. There have been a few times that we’ve been wrestling downstairs and I’ve tackled her to the ground, pinning her under my body, that flashes of things similar to what she’s asking me for have crossed my mind.

I would never hurt her. Phoebe is perfect and sweet and mine to protect. Mine. Sweet Phoebe is going to give me the reins to her body, the right to control her and make her do as I please, and I’m going to enjoy the hell out of it. I’m going to give my baby girl exactly what she needs and glue back together the shattered little pieces that should never have been broken.

My computer dings a notification and I grin. Ryan must have gotten word that Tony never made it back from going to get Phoebe, because he ran the next day, fleeing his normal routine and trying to find a way to hide from me. He’s not having much luck, and his little bit of luck has just run out. I found him.

Ryan, the motherfucker spending his last days hiding from me, is trying to cross the border into Mexico. But I’ve helped a lot of people in a lot of different places, and the border patrol owes me a little something. I answered a dark-web request for help when a man’s daughter went missing a year ago.

He didn’t know if she was in the US or Mexico. He didn’t think anyone would be able to find her. I found her location easily enough, but I couldn’t help. They probably would have benefitted from my assistance, but I wasn’t leaving my safehouse for it, and I definitely wasn’t traveling all the way to Puerto Palomas.

The girl ended up surviving, although not in the same condition she was in. Her dad took nearly his entire group of coworkers once they were off duty to rescue his daughter. The video footage I got from that one is just as good as the footage of Reaper and Emily.

Right now, Ryan is being thrown into the bed of a truck, hogtied and covered under a tarp. He’ll be driven to me and delivered like a package in a few hours, but I’ve got time. I’ll play with my woman before my prey arrives, and I’ll have to make sure she’s taken care of before I leave her alone to commit my next brutal crime.

I’ve spent a week apologizing and begging forgiveness. It seems to have paid off. And now, with adrenaline rushing through my body, what Phoebe has asked me for doesn’t seem scary at all.

My heart thumps in my chest and my cock stiffens in my pants. The kitten wants to be chased by someone bigger and stronger, and I’m very ready to do that. Maybe she needs to cross this one last line to be totally sure can trust me, but I think she already knows that she can. I think she wants to know that she’s in a situation now where she has control, where she just has to say one word to make it all stop.

Chapter Thirty-three

Phoebe

I’m coming out of the shower when he grabs me. Unexpected? Absolutely. Terrifying? Oh yeah. Painful? A little. His fingers dig into my belly as he yanks me back against him and his hand over my mouth makes my lips and cheeks hurt.

“Don’t scream,” he growls into my ear, and I don’t listen. I scream against his hand, then go off flailing and kicking, but I don’t make any progress, until I bite down on his palm and he releases me. I worry for a second that I’ve hurt him, but not long. I have three options from here: I can run to the bedroom, back in the bathroom, or down the stairs. The stairs feel dangerous, the bathroom is too close and too small.

I rush for the bedroom and crawl under the bed. I cover my own mouth to keep my loud breaths from telling him where I am. It feelsreal, and I’m grateful, because I need it to for this to work. My heart is pounding like crazy, and when he appears in front of me, crouching beside the bed reaching for my ankle, I scurry the other direction. I make it around the bed and back out the bedroom door.

Down the stairs I go, clenching the banister tightly so I won’t fall down the stairs. His heavy footsteps are right behind me, but I don’t stop to look back. I’m not going outside, at least not yet, so I spring through the living room and into the kitchen. He catches me there, looping an arm around my waist and halting me entirely.

“What’s your favorite color, pretty girl?”

Favorite color? What the fuck?He’s not asking me about my favorite color, he’s asking me if I need to stop. I don’t. “Green.”

His hand is harsh over my mouth again. “You fucking bit me, and Itold younot to scream.”

I kick my legs, but he isn’t loosening his grip. What happens next is completely up to him. He’s in control, and the trust fall happening in my insides is the most freeing thing I’ve ever experienced. My elbows fly back, but I don’t connect. Josiah grabs my wrists in front of me and pins them to the wall, letting go of my mouth. “Let me go,” I beg, but he doesn’t.

He locks both of my wrists in one of his hands and puts the other up my shirt, pushing my bra out of the way and roughly grabbing one of my breasts.

“Ow! You’re hurting me!” I buck my hips and fight against his hold on me, but he pinches my nipple so hard that a sharp pain radiates through my entire body, making me scream and fight him harder.

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