Page 54 of Rise of the King (Checkmate 5)

“You used me!”

“We used each other!” I shoot back. “I help you with your brother; you help me with my thing. Don’t pretend like this isn’t a good partnership. Don’t act like you regret it now that the truth is out.”

“You’re Ace! Which means we’ve been talking for two fucking years!” His large hand squeezes my upper arm, crushing skin against bone. “You could have told me two years ago who you were. I would’ve still helped you.”

“No, you would’ve hit on the pretty ballerina, then you would have shuffled me aside with a spiel about keeping the womenfolk safe. I did what I had to do, and I will continue to do what I have to do until this is finished.”

“Sophia!”

“You need me more than I need you,” I seethe. “I’m the brains. You’re the muscle. I can find muscle every time I step outside my apartment door, but you will never find someone with my skills, so don’t start your bullshit now. Move. Walk! I’m freezing and need to get inside to check my feet.”

“Your feet?” From angry to worried, his eyes shoot to the floor, though we both know he can’t see them. “You hurt?”

It’s funny how I still consider my feet my greatest asset. They used to be, back when I was considering a career as a dancer, but now they’re just feet. My brain is what I need most now; my brain is how we work our way to the top and end this empire. And yet, fear of injured feet still plagues me until I feel sick. “I’m fine, but I’m only wearing underwear under this coat, and another man’s blood on my skin. I want to go home and shower.”

* * *

It takes us only twenty minutes to walk home. By the time we enter the Benson building staircase and move up, Jay’s breathing seems normal, and my feet no longer hurt… they’re frozen.

One flight, then two. Jay stomps as we pass three, and zooms past four like he’s worried I’ll dump him and run. We enter my apartment and slam the door shut, and though he moves into the living room and rubs his arms to warm up, I only lean against my door and stare at the ceiling.

I hurt a man tonight. I almost choked him to death. Then I watched Jay finish what I started.

I so rarely get my hands dirty; I rarely leave my desk to get work done, but tonight I had to dance, to lure, and then to trap. But worst of all, worse than hurting another man, is the fact Jay found out who I am, and the whole walk home, his untrusting eyes kept creeping back over me as though to catalogue a brand-new person.

I deceived him, but I’m not sorry.

“Sophia?”

“Yeah.” I bring my eyes down and meet his all the way across the apartment. He’s covered in Trenton’s blood, his hands shaking, his eyes wild. “Yeah. I don’t wanna talk about it. I’m going to take a shower.” I pass by him and step a long way to the right when he reaches out. I don’t want to be touched. I don’t want to talk. I don’t want anything but an hour alone to grieve a little, then to breathe a little easier knowing one more man has been eliminated and won’t hurt girls like Ellie anymore.

“Babe?” Jay follows me into the bathroom and says nothing when I drop his coat to the floor and flip the taps on. Trenton’s blood covers my chest and stomach; it makes me itchy and anxious as I tug my stupid bejeweled bikini off and toss it in the trash. “Sophia?”

“I don’t wanna talk right now.”

“You said you weren’t a victim.” He tugs his shirt off and tosses it to the floor. “You said you’ve never been raped or hurt, so why are you hunting these men?”

I step under the hot shower and tip my head back until the water runs over my hair and face. I don’t tug the curtain shut, because he’s coming in whether I say he can or not.

“Sophia! Answer me, fuck!”

“I’ve never been hurt.” I glance down and watch Trenton’s blood wash from my skin and run down the drain. “I was seventeen when I was getting ready for my first ever dance where someone important would be watching. It was on a big stage, with big people. Lots of prestige,” I mumble. “I was supposed to be the next Anna Pavlova. I would tour the world, start a dance school, and live in infamy for my majesty.” Shaking my head when he drops his jeans and steps into the shower behind me, I pump soap into my hands and work it over my chest. “I was living in New York City and attending the most prestigious dance school the world knows, and Ellie, my baby sister, was visiting during spring break. She was fifteen, but she could dance too, so she wanted to come to see me, to see my school, to know what her future held.”

“Babe.”

“Don’t touch me.” I step forward and shake his hands from my hips. “She was fifteen, Jay. She wasn’t immature; she wasn’t partying; she wasn’t taking risks. She walked two doors down from my apartment to buy us ice cream, and poof, she was gone.”

I turn and meet his eyes. “She was stolen in the time it took me to take my slippers off and put my sneakers on. I was dancing in my apartment, just like I was dancing when you snuck in the other week. She wanted snacks, and the store was two fucking doors down, so I told her I’d catch up in just a moment.”

“You trusted her to be safe, Sophia. It was two doors. This wasn’t your fault.”

“I know it wasn’t my fault!” I thrust an arm toward the door. “It was theirs! Men like Trenton, like Cole, like Stan, and like whoever the fuck sits at the top and buys beautiful fifteen-year-old girls. That’s why I used you, and that’s why I’m not sorry. I won’t apologize to you, Jay. Fuck you if you think I owe you an apology. If you wanna leave, leave. If you want to rant about deceit or broken trust, do it. But do it in your own apartment away from me.”

“I don’t think you owe me an apology.” He grabs my wrist and pulls it forward to catch a glimpse of the vines sneaking along my arm.Your wings were ready, but my heart was not.“Your baby sister.”

“You’re here to make your brother safe. I’m here to take down each and every man who took part in Ellie’s death. I figured you could relate with the sibling worry.”

“I can relate.” He brings my arm up and presses his lips to my wrist. My forearm. The ball of my shoulder. “I’m not mad at you, baby. I was in shock; I was confused; I was… okay,” he chuckles. “I was a little mad. But I think I jumped on board pretty quick, no?”

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